A Cosleeping Family

I have always been very pro cosleeping.  Even back in high school I knew I wanted to cosleep with my babies.  I think it's the healthiest way for babies to sleep, and it's biologically normal.  Then I became the world's worst sleeper, had a baby (who became a super loud grunter), and became an even worse sleeper.  Despite attempting to cosleep with Noah, he was moved into his own room at a couple of weeks old.  I'm not going to tell the entire history of Noah's sleep here, though.

When I was pregnant with Isaiah I knew I wanted to try cosleeping again.  But then he was an even louder grunter than Noah, so at less than a week old he was moved into his own room.  Gradually the grunting subsided (like it did with Noah), but he was sleeping so well on his own that there was really no reason to move him into a room with me.  Why mess with a good thing, right?

Except, like with Noah, that "good thing" was very temporary, and I was back to jolting out of bed and stumbling through the dark into his room to nurse him 2, 3, or 4 times a night.

When Noah was sick over Christmas, Justin started sleeping with him.  They both really enjoyed it, so it continued after he got better (it's been a month now).  This was more than fine with me, because I spent way too much time lying awake listening to Justin breathe loudly or snore.  We played musical beds to give them my new queen bed to sleep in, and moved the gloriously huge and comfortable king back into the master bedroom (we HAD been sleeping in two queen beds pushed together because I'm such a bad sleeper) with Noah's former crib side-car'd up against it.

I was hesitant to try cosleeping again, since I had never been successful at it.  But Isaiah's sleep was already kind of crappy, so I decided to try it.

Halfway through the first night I moved him back to his room, thinking he might sleep better in there.  He didn't.

The second night I was very iffy about trying it again, but I decided to power through anyway since I have never felt fully comfortable having my kids in different rooms than me.  That night was great.  Having my baby on a separate sleep surface but directly beside me and on my level with no barriers between us what just what we needed.  I felt so much less stressed laying next to him instead of having him in a different room. Every time he woke up, I was already awake anyway, and nursing him was so much less disruptive.

We've slept together 2 more nights since then, but without the "iffy"ness.  Instead, I look forward to it!  I have slept decently, and I love having Isaiah next to me.  I thought I would sleep on the opposite side of the king bed from where the crib is, but I'm actually more comfortable sleeping directly next to him.

So, that's that.  We cosleep now, and we're all pretty darn happy about it.  My dream scenario would be to have all 4 of us in the same room in one giant bed.  We have the beds to do it (we own 3 queens, 1 king, a double, a single, and 2 cribs... we could sleep a lot of people in our house!), but I don't know if it will ever happen.

Crib Issues Solved... For Now

Yesterday I posted about how Noah just learned how to get out of his crib: by somersaulting over the railing - HEAD FIRST.  

Every time I put him in his crib and he didn't want to be in there, he did this.  So we were going to have to move to a big boy bed.  We had the whole thing set up - crib railing off, queen mattress on the floor beside the open-sided crib, a baby gate adjusted to fit his doorway... but I was totally sick to my stomach over it.  I knew Noah was nowhere near ready to sleep outside of a crib.  Not. Even. Close.  I knew that the night would involve a lot of hysterical screaming while standing at the gate in his doorway, and next to no sleep would occur.

Lest you think that I am just "in denial," and that it's just me who isn't ready for the "big boy bed" step (like someone on Facebook - who doesn't even know my child - suggested), let me tell you that all evening Noah was saying that sleeping on his new bed was going to be scary.  I was lying on the bed with him and turned out the lights and turned on the fan, and he told me right away it was too scary.  He loved having that big mattress on his floor so he could do gymnastics and jump around on it, but he didn't want to have to sleep on it.

It was pretty clear this was not going to work. But at the last minute - literally Noah was sitting on my bed in his pajamas playing on my iPod waiting to nurse - I found a solution that had bought us some more time. 

We took the crib support out of the crib, put the rail back on, and put the new baby's crib mattress under Noah's crib mattress inside of the crib. This way the top of the mattress is lower than before. We also took off the bumper pad on the outside of the crib. We have the breathable bumpers, which are "collapsible," but even when they collapsed they were giving Noah an extra inch of height.

We kept the queen mattress on the floor outside of his crib, so if he does manage to dive out head first again (even though the crib railing is now at his neck instead of under his chest), hopefully he won't break his neck.

He was passed out before I even got him in his crib last night.  And I got him right when he woke up in the morning.  He didn't have a chance to attempt to climb out, so I wasn't sure if he would do it.  We're going through a chillier spell right now, so for nap time today I put him in a sleep sack.  He cried (which he never does at nap anymore) and tried to climb out, but quickly realized he wouldn't be able to and went to sleep for 40 minutes.  Tonight he is in a sleep sack again, but he was tired so he didn't bother trying to get out.

I think I've bought us some more time with the crib.  The sleep sack gives me an extra feeling of security, but it's fleece, and he can't wear it when our house is 75 degrees.  I'm going to try to find someone who can make me a couple of light cotton sleep sacks.  Noah is about 37 inches tall, so it's not like I can find them in the stores!

(Side note/rant: what is with people on Facebook trying to tell me what is going on with my own kid when obviously no one in the world knows him better than I do??  This has happened on several occasions now. Just because YOUR kid did well in a big boy bed at 18 months old when he started escaping his crib doesn't mean MY 26 month old will.  Every kid is different!  And I am certainly not "ignoring my kid's cues"... just because a toddler can escape from his crib doesn't mean that he is ready to be able to wander around his room and house at night.  Don't presume to know what is best for MY kid.  If he tells me he is scared of not being in his crib, I'm pretty sure that's a freaking "cue" that he isn't ready for that step!  Don't imply to me that I don't have good parenting instincts and can't follow my kid's lead - I have freaking amazing parenting instincts.  I am very in tune with my child, and I bend over backwards each and every day to make the best possible decisions concerning him.  So bite me.)

Crib Issues

Last night I gave Noah a time out.  He hadn't had one in a LONG time, and I felt like we were having to say "Do you want a time out?" before he would behave a little too often.  He would then obey, but not until we asked him if he wanted a time out.

So I decided last night, between bath and bed, when he wasn't obeying, to actually give him a time out.  He screamed harder than he had ever screamed before, and within 15 seconds we heard a huge thud.

Noah had flipped himself out of his crib.

Then he did it this morning as soon as he woke up.  Then he did it as soon as I put him in his crib for nap today.

Then when Justin and I were in his room with him, we saw exactly how he was accomplishing this.  He gets a little leverage with his feet, and then literally bends in half over the railing and somersaults out.  Head first.

This is a nightmare for me.  Seriously.  Noah is nowhere near ready to be out of a crib, and yet I can't keep him in it for the life of me.  I wanted to keep him in a crib until he was at least 3 years old.  However, we don't want a 2 year old with a broken neck.  Therefore, we have had to take the railing off his crib and put an old queen mattress on the floor of his bedroom.

He is so not going to sleep tonight.  It's a toss up between whether he will jump around on the huge bed excitedly for awhile before he starts screaming and crying, or whether he will just go right to the screaming.

I can tell you that I already tried having him sleep on a mattress at naptime, and he wouldn't even stay on it, much less stay in his room.  So we are also going to have to gate him into his bedroom, which will fuel the screams.

Did I mention this is my nightmare?


(For better Noah news, check out my post from earlier today on potty training, which is basically a done deal now!)