Today is my last day babysitting Aubrey.
I have discovered I have zero desire to ever run my own day care. I had never planned on doing that, but I think it's something that many stay at home moms think of, however fleetingly, as a possibility in case you find yourself in need of more cash. The idea occured to me once or twice, never very seriously, but I now know that I will not do that. Not even for a good friend. I think that my friendship with Erin's has been slightly awkwardized (shut up, it's a word) by the fact that I'm working for her. I think of it as doing her a favour (heck at $34 a day, it is a favour), but essentially I guess I am working for her.
That's not the only reason I don't want to do this again. It's also the actual act of babysitting. An afternoon every once in while wouldn't be too bad. But knowing that one or two days every week, I am tied down to my house all day with an extra kid who isn't mine... it doesn't sound like much, but I have found that I just don't like it.
It's not that Aubrey is bad. She's a very good, sweet little girl, and very similar to Noah. They get along quite well, except for the fact that she is a drama queen and overreacts to almost everything. Sometimes she'll start crying like Noah is pulling her hair out, when he's just trying to give her a gentle hug.
(I admit that that could be part of the reason I haven't loved the babysitting so much. I don't like seeing my son get rejected for being a little sweetie-pie ;)
But really, it's mostly because after having my very own baby, I don't have that much interest in other people's babies. Before having Noah, I always wanted to hug, kiss, hold, play with, and change the diapers of other people's babies. Since having him, I have no interest in that. Nobody's kid is as cool as my kid (in my eyes, anyway). And it's funny how things that don't gross me out about Noah do gross me out about other babies. I can wipe food off of Noah's mouth and lick it off my finger. I don't think twice. If Noah accidentally pees on my floor, I'm not disgusted. Noah can drool in my mouth, I don't care. His snot isn't gross, it's just another part of him.
I guess nothing really grosses me out about Noah because he's such a part of me. Literally. My body made him. And his whole life he has either gotten him nutrition through me from nursing, or he has eaten pretty much exactly the same food I eat. So I basically see him as an extension of myself. Actually, I probably find him less gross than I find myself!
However, despite my relief about being done babysitting her, I am sad that they are leaving. Noah loves Aubrey. It'll be sad to not having them living across the street anymore.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
What Are the Odds
After writing that post last night, Noah went ahead and confirmed all my fears by having a terrible night last night. He woke up crying constantly. I only got him and nursed him once, but that didn't stop him from crying over and over, and waking up for the day super early.
This doesn't make me concerned about a "new sleeping pattern" or anything like that. But it certainly makes me super afraid about what it will be like at the cottage. And at the cottage I can't escape it and actually get some sleep by closing his door, my door, and turning the fan up to high. I'm stuck in the same room as him. And I won't fall asleep after he falls asleep. I'll lie awake waiting for the next crying episode.
I'm seriously considering cancelling.
This doesn't make me concerned about a "new sleeping pattern" or anything like that. But it certainly makes me super afraid about what it will be like at the cottage. And at the cottage I can't escape it and actually get some sleep by closing his door, my door, and turning the fan up to high. I'm stuck in the same room as him. And I won't fall asleep after he falls asleep. I'll lie awake waiting for the next crying episode.
I'm seriously considering cancelling.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Upcoming Vacation
Next Tuesday Justin, Noah, and I are leaving to join my parents at the cottage in Muskoka. We did this last year when Noah was 3.5 months old. It went really well. Except that he started a sleep regression while we were up there that lasted until he was 7 months and we were finally forced to let him CIO.
However, this year he is 15.5 months old. It's a whole other ball game, and I am getting extremely nervous about it. This child has not slept in a crib that was not his own since he was 9 months old. Not because I haven't tried, but because he physically wouldn't sleep. He just cried and cried. He also has not slept in a pack 'n play since then.
The sleeping arrangement at the cottage is for Noah to sleep in a pack 'n play in the same small room as us.
He does not sleep in the same room as us - if he wakes up and sees us, I'm fairly certain it will make him cry and cry and cry and cry....
He will not sleep in the same bed as us, because he thinks it's playtime. I've tried it. Besides, I could never sleep with him in bed with me. Again, I've tried it. I'd be more than willing to go this route if it would actually lead to sleep for us, but it won't.
I am not against CIO - its actually a normal part of our lives. I didn't want it to be (ohh, how I was against it, and ohhh how I judged parents who used it), but unfortunately we do not get to chose the temperaments of our children, and my child responds to nothing else. Everything else just prolongs the process of getting to sleep. As in, hours and hours of screaming. I do nurse him to sleep most of the time. However, if he doesn't fall asleep nursing, sometimes he goes to bed awake with no problems, and sometimes he cries first. It usually doesn't last more than a few minutes.
However, I'm not too keen on the idea of taking him to a new place, a new room, putting him in a strange contraption that he has zero memory of ever sleeping in, and letting him scream. I will feel terrible doing that. It just seems so mean! What if he thinks I've abandoned him? What if he is legitimately scared, not just protesting the idea of sleep?
However, he is also a child who protests the idea of sleep. He doesn't just cry over 'abandonment issues.' I am fairly certain that if I stay in the room with him, he will scream for hours just because I'm there, try to climb out of the pack 'n play, and wonder why I won't pick him up.
I'm not sure there's any way for me to win, here. I am really really scared that his sleep will go so far into the toilet I won't be able to get it back out again. And I'm not sure how I'm going to survive if I'M not getting any sleep.
I've already decided that if the sleep situation is unbearable, we will leave after a couple of days. This will suck though, because it is a 5 hour drive there and back - it hardly seems worth it.
Why are we going, you ask? Well, my parents really love Noah, and really love Justin and I, and really want us to be there. And the awake time should be lots of fun. I have been to Muskoka every summer of my life, except for the summer we conceived Noah (we were in the middle of treatments, and the actual IUI was July 7, while my family was up at the cottage). I love it up there. Sand, water, new surroundings... I think Noah will love that part of it.
So, here is where I ask you for help/advice. If you have a child similar to Noah, how have you gotten them to sleep properly in a new place?
Also, what the heck should I do with a 15 month old during a 5 hour car ride? He will sleep for part of it, but most likely only for a hour, hour and a half tops. Are there any activities or especially captivating toys or videos or something that will entertain him during the other 4 hours?
However, this year he is 15.5 months old. It's a whole other ball game, and I am getting extremely nervous about it. This child has not slept in a crib that was not his own since he was 9 months old. Not because I haven't tried, but because he physically wouldn't sleep. He just cried and cried. He also has not slept in a pack 'n play since then.
The sleeping arrangement at the cottage is for Noah to sleep in a pack 'n play in the same small room as us.
He does not sleep in the same room as us - if he wakes up and sees us, I'm fairly certain it will make him cry and cry and cry and cry....
He will not sleep in the same bed as us, because he thinks it's playtime. I've tried it. Besides, I could never sleep with him in bed with me. Again, I've tried it. I'd be more than willing to go this route if it would actually lead to sleep for us, but it won't.
I am not against CIO - its actually a normal part of our lives. I didn't want it to be (ohh, how I was against it, and ohhh how I judged parents who used it), but unfortunately we do not get to chose the temperaments of our children, and my child responds to nothing else. Everything else just prolongs the process of getting to sleep. As in, hours and hours of screaming. I do nurse him to sleep most of the time. However, if he doesn't fall asleep nursing, sometimes he goes to bed awake with no problems, and sometimes he cries first. It usually doesn't last more than a few minutes.
However, I'm not too keen on the idea of taking him to a new place, a new room, putting him in a strange contraption that he has zero memory of ever sleeping in, and letting him scream. I will feel terrible doing that. It just seems so mean! What if he thinks I've abandoned him? What if he is legitimately scared, not just protesting the idea of sleep?
However, he is also a child who protests the idea of sleep. He doesn't just cry over 'abandonment issues.' I am fairly certain that if I stay in the room with him, he will scream for hours just because I'm there, try to climb out of the pack 'n play, and wonder why I won't pick him up.
I'm not sure there's any way for me to win, here. I am really really scared that his sleep will go so far into the toilet I won't be able to get it back out again. And I'm not sure how I'm going to survive if I'M not getting any sleep.
I've already decided that if the sleep situation is unbearable, we will leave after a couple of days. This will suck though, because it is a 5 hour drive there and back - it hardly seems worth it.
Why are we going, you ask? Well, my parents really love Noah, and really love Justin and I, and really want us to be there. And the awake time should be lots of fun. I have been to Muskoka every summer of my life, except for the summer we conceived Noah (we were in the middle of treatments, and the actual IUI was July 7, while my family was up at the cottage). I love it up there. Sand, water, new surroundings... I think Noah will love that part of it.
So, here is where I ask you for help/advice. If you have a child similar to Noah, how have you gotten them to sleep properly in a new place?
Also, what the heck should I do with a 15 month old during a 5 hour car ride? He will sleep for part of it, but most likely only for a hour, hour and a half tops. Are there any activities or especially captivating toys or videos or something that will entertain him during the other 4 hours?
Thursday, June 23, 2011
I May Have a Touch of "The Fever"
Baby Fever, that is.
For most of Noah's life so far I have had zero desire to have another baby. I knew in my head I wanted more children, but I didn't have that burning desire like I had the first time. I thought that was weird, because Noah was becoming a toddler, and I thought I would want another baby soon. When he was born I thought we'd be doing treatments again when he was a year old. But I just didn't have the yearning. I didn't know when it would come, or if it would ever come. I actually thought we might have to just try for another baby without actually having that strong desire. I couldn't imagine when I would get to that place.
Well, as the days go by, it appears that I am creeping closer and closer to that place all the time. Whereas before I would occasionally have a desire to be pregnant or have a newborn, now that desire is becoming more frequent. That desire is becoming stronger than my desire to not. More of my time is now spent wanting another baby than not wanting another baby.
I'm not sure how I feel about this. Ideally I would like Noah to be a bit older before I get pregnant. Or even a lot older. I would really like to nurse him until he's at least two, for many reasons, one of them being that 2 years old is the recommended minimum. Using fertility medications to get pregnant could quite possibly put a wrench in our nursing relationship. Furthermore, getting pregnant could mess it up. You can nurse when you're pregnant, but it's fairly common to experience a reduction in your milk supply, and many women have very sore nipples and breasts during pregnancy, making nursing very uncomfortable. I know what this feels like every month while I'm ovulating, and it's a toe curling, teeth gritting kind of pain that makes me dread every latch.
Not to mention the fact that Noah still nurses overnight, and he still very much needs his Mommy at this point in his life. I know that if I got pregnant now, by the time I would have the baby he would be almost two, or over two. But morning sickness happens right away. I couldn't imagine how I'd deal with morning sickness and Noah. And my pelvic issues were happening before I hit 30 weeks... how would I be a cripple with a 20 month old son? What about me only getting 3-5 hours of sleep every night because of being pregnant and uncomfortable. What about having a newborn and only getting 1-2 hours of sleep in every 24 hour period? The thought of the sleeplessness alone has kiboshed any real desire to procreate again anytime soon.
Until now.
The thing is, those things seemed insurmountable a month or two ago. Now they seem like something I would be willing to tackle. They don't seem quite as scary. Up until now I have felt unwilling to purposefully change Noah's life in order to accommodate another baby. Now I feel like I might actually be ready to do just that.
I'm getting a little freaked out by this feeling. I don't want to have that desire again right now. I'd rather wait another 6 months, or 9 months. But the fact is, I do have that feeling. And I'm not exactly sure what to do about it.
We are definitely trying naturally. I'm pretty sure I am actually ovulating now. My body acts like it is, and it never acted like this in the 14 months we were trying before we got pregnant. But we still have the MFI to deal with.
I know we will probably have to do treatments. I'm not ready for that yet. But with the way I'm starting to feel, I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to put it off. I don't want to try naturally month after month and experience the heartbreak month after month. That's too hard on me, emotionally. Especially since we know what our issues are.
I didn't think I would be dealing with this when Noah was 15 months old!
For most of Noah's life so far I have had zero desire to have another baby. I knew in my head I wanted more children, but I didn't have that burning desire like I had the first time. I thought that was weird, because Noah was becoming a toddler, and I thought I would want another baby soon. When he was born I thought we'd be doing treatments again when he was a year old. But I just didn't have the yearning. I didn't know when it would come, or if it would ever come. I actually thought we might have to just try for another baby without actually having that strong desire. I couldn't imagine when I would get to that place.
Well, as the days go by, it appears that I am creeping closer and closer to that place all the time. Whereas before I would occasionally have a desire to be pregnant or have a newborn, now that desire is becoming more frequent. That desire is becoming stronger than my desire to not. More of my time is now spent wanting another baby than not wanting another baby.
I'm not sure how I feel about this. Ideally I would like Noah to be a bit older before I get pregnant. Or even a lot older. I would really like to nurse him until he's at least two, for many reasons, one of them being that 2 years old is the recommended minimum. Using fertility medications to get pregnant could quite possibly put a wrench in our nursing relationship. Furthermore, getting pregnant could mess it up. You can nurse when you're pregnant, but it's fairly common to experience a reduction in your milk supply, and many women have very sore nipples and breasts during pregnancy, making nursing very uncomfortable. I know what this feels like every month while I'm ovulating, and it's a toe curling, teeth gritting kind of pain that makes me dread every latch.
Not to mention the fact that Noah still nurses overnight, and he still very much needs his Mommy at this point in his life. I know that if I got pregnant now, by the time I would have the baby he would be almost two, or over two. But morning sickness happens right away. I couldn't imagine how I'd deal with morning sickness and Noah. And my pelvic issues were happening before I hit 30 weeks... how would I be a cripple with a 20 month old son? What about me only getting 3-5 hours of sleep every night because of being pregnant and uncomfortable. What about having a newborn and only getting 1-2 hours of sleep in every 24 hour period? The thought of the sleeplessness alone has kiboshed any real desire to procreate again anytime soon.
Until now.
The thing is, those things seemed insurmountable a month or two ago. Now they seem like something I would be willing to tackle. They don't seem quite as scary. Up until now I have felt unwilling to purposefully change Noah's life in order to accommodate another baby. Now I feel like I might actually be ready to do just that.
I'm getting a little freaked out by this feeling. I don't want to have that desire again right now. I'd rather wait another 6 months, or 9 months. But the fact is, I do have that feeling. And I'm not exactly sure what to do about it.
We are definitely trying naturally. I'm pretty sure I am actually ovulating now. My body acts like it is, and it never acted like this in the 14 months we were trying before we got pregnant. But we still have the MFI to deal with.
I know we will probably have to do treatments. I'm not ready for that yet. But with the way I'm starting to feel, I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to put it off. I don't want to try naturally month after month and experience the heartbreak month after month. That's too hard on me, emotionally. Especially since we know what our issues are.
I didn't think I would be dealing with this when Noah was 15 months old!
Cycle #3
Cycle #3 is old news, as I'm currently ovulating - or at least my body thinks it's ovulating - in Cycle #4. But I need a reliable place to record my info from Cycle #3.
-It was a 39 day cycle.
-CD 1 was Monday, April 18.
-I had EWCM from CD 25 to CD 28 (May 12 - May 15).
-I had moderately sore nipples on CD 28 (May 15).
-I had really sore nipples from CD 29 - CD 30 (May 16 - May 17)
-My period came on Friday, May 27
This cycle seemed more under control than the last one. My EWCM was not as prolonged, and I didn't have sore nipples for as long. I think I probably ovulated on the CD 28, May 15th, my last day of EWCM. This would put my luteal phase at 11 days.
We gave it a shot again during this cycle, like the cycle before, but obviously it was not successful. My heart wasn't really in it last month, though. So it's okay.
-It was a 39 day cycle.
-CD 1 was Monday, April 18.
-I had EWCM from CD 25 to CD 28 (May 12 - May 15).
-I had moderately sore nipples on CD 28 (May 15).
-I had really sore nipples from CD 29 - CD 30 (May 16 - May 17)
-My period came on Friday, May 27
This cycle seemed more under control than the last one. My EWCM was not as prolonged, and I didn't have sore nipples for as long. I think I probably ovulated on the CD 28, May 15th, my last day of EWCM. This would put my luteal phase at 11 days.
We gave it a shot again during this cycle, like the cycle before, but obviously it was not successful. My heart wasn't really in it last month, though. So it's okay.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
15 Months Old
15 months, I can't even believe it.
Here is what Noah is up to at 15 months old:
-I'm guessing he's about 22lbs, but don't actually know.
-He is about 34 inches tall.
-He is in size 4 diapers during the day and night.
-He wears size 4 shoes.
-He nurses on demand, still about 10 times a day, but less if we're out somewhere with people he enjoys. He'll get too busy to ask for it. and I end up having to initiate it myself so that my supply doesn't get messed up.
-He still enjoys a balance of feeding himself and being fed when he eats solids. He eats mostly grown up food, but sometimes still has purees.
-He has 12 teeth. 8 of them are fully in (and have been since 8 months), 4 of them are molars that are partially broken through, but not fully. He is currently cutting 6 teeth. His 4 first year molars, which have been erupting for the past 2 months, and his upper canines. Poor baby.
-He has one nap a day, usually about an hour long.
-He sleeps 11-11.5 hours at night, getting up to nurse once. Bedtime is between 8 and 8:30pm most nights.
-He signs to nurse (the sign for milk), for water (waves his hand up and down), and to eat (sticks his finger in his mouth). Those are the only signs I'm consistent with, otherwise I'm sure he'd sign more.
-He has had a verbal explosion this month. He says 18 words now! They are: Mama, Dada, uh oh, more, this, that, cat, night night, hot, up, yes, woof woof ("what does a dog say?"), baa ("what does a sheep say?"), moo ("what does a cow say?"), car, ball, shoes, cracker. He mostly sticks with the beginning sounds in words; he's not much for the ending sounds.
-His verbal comprehension is unreal. I am always amazed that he seems to understand almost everything I say to him, follows multi-step directions, and nods or shakes his head appropriately when I ask him questions.
-He still loves to clean my house. He vacuums, dustbusts, swiffers, and dusts my tables... I wish he was a little more thorough though ;)
-This past month Noah has gotten more opinionated when it comes to running errands. He's no longer content in the cart, or stroller, or sling. Now he has his own ideas about what he wants to be doing (ie. walking around the store on his own pulling things off of shelves). He used to just come along with me wherever and was so well behaved and quiet the whole time. I miss that.
-Noah can open doors, closets, the dishwasher, the fridge, the stove, the sliding door... there's pretty much nothing that is off limits to him. According to him, anyway.
-He loves our cat Emmie (Lexie won't let him near her). He pets him, kisses him, hugs him... it almost makes cleaning up the cat hair worth it.
-He is a very affectionate little boy, with lots of hugs and kisses for Mommy. He's now getting better about giving Daddy a hug and kiss every night at bedtime.
-He just had his 12th illness this past week - a mild cold that lasted about 4 days. It wasn't a big deal, but I have no idea where it came from. I had it too, obviously.
I've been working on this off and on all day. It's 10pm now. I'm just going to post it. I don't have anything eloquent to say.
I love my kid!
The End.
Here is what Noah is up to at 15 months old:
-I'm guessing he's about 22lbs, but don't actually know.
-He is about 34 inches tall.
-He is in size 4 diapers during the day and night.
-He wears size 4 shoes.
-He nurses on demand, still about 10 times a day, but less if we're out somewhere with people he enjoys. He'll get too busy to ask for it. and I end up having to initiate it myself so that my supply doesn't get messed up.
-He still enjoys a balance of feeding himself and being fed when he eats solids. He eats mostly grown up food, but sometimes still has purees.
-He has 12 teeth. 8 of them are fully in (and have been since 8 months), 4 of them are molars that are partially broken through, but not fully. He is currently cutting 6 teeth. His 4 first year molars, which have been erupting for the past 2 months, and his upper canines. Poor baby.
-He has one nap a day, usually about an hour long.
-He sleeps 11-11.5 hours at night, getting up to nurse once. Bedtime is between 8 and 8:30pm most nights.
-He signs to nurse (the sign for milk), for water (waves his hand up and down), and to eat (sticks his finger in his mouth). Those are the only signs I'm consistent with, otherwise I'm sure he'd sign more.
-He has had a verbal explosion this month. He says 18 words now! They are: Mama, Dada, uh oh, more, this, that, cat, night night, hot, up, yes, woof woof ("what does a dog say?"), baa ("what does a sheep say?"), moo ("what does a cow say?"), car, ball, shoes, cracker. He mostly sticks with the beginning sounds in words; he's not much for the ending sounds.
-His verbal comprehension is unreal. I am always amazed that he seems to understand almost everything I say to him, follows multi-step directions, and nods or shakes his head appropriately when I ask him questions.
-He still loves to clean my house. He vacuums, dustbusts, swiffers, and dusts my tables... I wish he was a little more thorough though ;)
-This past month Noah has gotten more opinionated when it comes to running errands. He's no longer content in the cart, or stroller, or sling. Now he has his own ideas about what he wants to be doing (ie. walking around the store on his own pulling things off of shelves). He used to just come along with me wherever and was so well behaved and quiet the whole time. I miss that.
-Noah can open doors, closets, the dishwasher, the fridge, the stove, the sliding door... there's pretty much nothing that is off limits to him. According to him, anyway.
-He loves our cat Emmie (Lexie won't let him near her). He pets him, kisses him, hugs him... it almost makes cleaning up the cat hair worth it.
-He is a very affectionate little boy, with lots of hugs and kisses for Mommy. He's now getting better about giving Daddy a hug and kiss every night at bedtime.
-He just had his 12th illness this past week - a mild cold that lasted about 4 days. It wasn't a big deal, but I have no idea where it came from. I had it too, obviously.
I've been working on this off and on all day. It's 10pm now. I'm just going to post it. I don't have anything eloquent to say.
I love my kid!
The End.
Friday, June 17, 2011
The Nap Aliens Have Taken Over My Baby
I cannot believe what happened this morning.
I wanted to run some errands, but we ended up not being able to go until 11:45. Noah woke up at 7:30 this morning, after only 10.5 hours of sleep (we had unexpected company last night right before bedtime, so he got to bed late), so I knew as soon as we got home he'd probably have to go down for a nap.
We went to Shoppers and then to Home Hardware, where I had to put him in the stroller because they don't have carts.
We walk into the store and I find the levels (part of a Father's Day gift). Noah is being quiet and still, so I look at him, and he's CONKED out. He's sitting straight up in the stroller and we've only been in the store for a maximum of 2 minutes, and he passed out. I tried to wake him up, but I couldn't. I lowered the back of the seat so he was lying down, bought a level, and went out to the van. When we got there I took him out of the stroller and put him in the carseat and he stayed asleep. I drove home, took him out of the carseat and put him in his crib, and HE STAYED ASLEEP.
Who is this kid??? He has never fallen asleep in his stroller except when he was a really small baby and he slept in the travel system a couple of times. But that was only if we were moving, and only a couple of times. He has certainly never fallen asleep while sitting up, in the span of two minutes, in a noisy store, and then been impossible to wake up.
I can't believe I was able to pick him up and transfer him to new surroundings multiple times, and he stayed dead asleep. This is nuts! This is not my child. Furthermore, he has been coughing like crazy all throughout his nap (we both have another cold - thankfully this one is mild), and he's continuing to sleep.
This may not seem strange to many of you parents out there, but it is for us! For most of his life, Noah would only sleep in his crib. In the past month he has fallen asleep nursing in church, fallen asleep nursing in a loud room full of 60 people, and fallen asleep in a noisy store sitting straight up in his stroller.
It's wonderful.
I wanted to run some errands, but we ended up not being able to go until 11:45. Noah woke up at 7:30 this morning, after only 10.5 hours of sleep (we had unexpected company last night right before bedtime, so he got to bed late), so I knew as soon as we got home he'd probably have to go down for a nap.
We went to Shoppers and then to Home Hardware, where I had to put him in the stroller because they don't have carts.
We walk into the store and I find the levels (part of a Father's Day gift). Noah is being quiet and still, so I look at him, and he's CONKED out. He's sitting straight up in the stroller and we've only been in the store for a maximum of 2 minutes, and he passed out. I tried to wake him up, but I couldn't. I lowered the back of the seat so he was lying down, bought a level, and went out to the van. When we got there I took him out of the stroller and put him in the carseat and he stayed asleep. I drove home, took him out of the carseat and put him in his crib, and HE STAYED ASLEEP.
Who is this kid??? He has never fallen asleep in his stroller except when he was a really small baby and he slept in the travel system a couple of times. But that was only if we were moving, and only a couple of times. He has certainly never fallen asleep while sitting up, in the span of two minutes, in a noisy store, and then been impossible to wake up.
I can't believe I was able to pick him up and transfer him to new surroundings multiple times, and he stayed dead asleep. This is nuts! This is not my child. Furthermore, he has been coughing like crazy all throughout his nap (we both have another cold - thankfully this one is mild), and he's continuing to sleep.
This may not seem strange to many of you parents out there, but it is for us! For most of his life, Noah would only sleep in his crib. In the past month he has fallen asleep nursing in church, fallen asleep nursing in a loud room full of 60 people, and fallen asleep in a noisy store sitting straight up in his stroller.
It's wonderful.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Getting Rid of Crap
(This is my 500th post... I thought I should mention that, even though I don't make much attention to that stuff.)
I think I'm becoming Minimalish. Definitely not Minimalist, but maybe Minimalish. I sick of having so much stuff, and I'm taking steps to get rid of it.
We live in a 2500 square foot house that has almost no storage. There is a small crawl space under the stairs, and a small amount of storage space in the laundry room/furnace room. There are, however, 5 bedrooms plus a large office. We dedicated one bedroom to be used as storage, and the office has also gotten awfully storage-y.
This arrangement has never been acceptable to me. We would like to have three children, ultimately. I don't want my 3 children to have to share bedrooms when we have a 5+1 bedroom house. Plus we need to have a spare room with a queen bed for Justin to sleep in when I'm not sleeping and he's breathing loudly (can you say 'every night'?). So between the 3 kids, Justin and I, and the spare room, we need all 5 bedrooms.
This takes away our storage bedroom. And leaves us nowhere to put the crap that dwells in there.
I know right now we only have one kid. But I'm a planner. I think ahead. It's what I do. So my goal is to fit all of our storage stuff in the laundry room, crawl space, and maybe a little bit in the office.
If you saw how many boxes and bins we have, you would realize that is currently impossible.
I have realized that, really, we shouldn't need storage space. Not much of it, anyway. With the exception of baby stuff we are saving for the next child (which we have too much of), if we don't use this stuff, why do we even have it? Why are we letting bins and bins of stuff take up space in our home? It's weighing me down, mentally and physically.
So I'm getting rid of crap.
I started with half my wardrobe. That's right, I gave 50% of my clothing to goodwill. I got rid of all my clothes that are nice, but don't fit. I got rid of all my clothes that fit well and flatter my figure, but I never wear. I got rid of all the stuff that I don't wear, but I might wear someday. Because I finally got it through my head that even if I might wear it someday, that doesn't mean I need to wear it someday. I have other clothes I can wear instead.
Everything left in my closet and drawers are clothes I have worn in the past year (allowing for seasonal changes, and minus my maternity wear which I haven't worn for 15 months but will be wearing again one day, hopefully). It makes me feel free. I want to get rid of more! As someone who always had the hardest time parting with clothing, finally getting rid of stuff is addicting! I'm forcing myself to take my time with some of the clothes, because I don't want to regret getting rid of something. But I could really get rid of a lot more. My ultimate goal in this area is to be able to fit both Justin's and my clothes in our walk-in closet, which currently only holds my clothes. Justin has his own double closet in the upstairs spare room (yeah... we need to work on that).
I am also getting rid of other stuff we don't need. Things I packed away when I was decluttering... what's the point in keeping it? I don't need a box full of fun and fancy coffee mugs. I never used them in the 3 years they sat in the cupboard, and I have 16 coffee mugs left that belong in my dishware set. The stereos and CD players I haven't used in ages... why keep them? The old TV taking up space in the office? We will never use it, let someone else have it.
I have a plan in my head to go through the bins that were tranferred here from my parents house and be ruthless. I have three bins filled with memorabilia. I think I could whittle it down to one. Two, at the most.
I'm not sure what to do with the $7000 worth of university books and texts. I wish I had sold them to the used bookstore on campus after I was done with them. I kept them out of pride. I read every single word in every single one of those books! And there are hundreds of books! Most of them are in perfect condition, but as far as I know there's no market for these books at the second hand bookstore where I live. I might be able to donate them to a library, but I really wish I could get some sort of profit from them. Making some money on them would make it easier to part with them.
I need to convince Justin to get rid of some of his boxes, too. I might just do it for him. He doesn't even know what's down there, so what would it hurt?
I think I'm becoming Minimalish. Definitely not Minimalist, but maybe Minimalish. I sick of having so much stuff, and I'm taking steps to get rid of it.
We live in a 2500 square foot house that has almost no storage. There is a small crawl space under the stairs, and a small amount of storage space in the laundry room/furnace room. There are, however, 5 bedrooms plus a large office. We dedicated one bedroom to be used as storage, and the office has also gotten awfully storage-y.
This arrangement has never been acceptable to me. We would like to have three children, ultimately. I don't want my 3 children to have to share bedrooms when we have a 5+1 bedroom house. Plus we need to have a spare room with a queen bed for Justin to sleep in when I'm not sleeping and he's breathing loudly (can you say 'every night'?). So between the 3 kids, Justin and I, and the spare room, we need all 5 bedrooms.
This takes away our storage bedroom. And leaves us nowhere to put the crap that dwells in there.
I know right now we only have one kid. But I'm a planner. I think ahead. It's what I do. So my goal is to fit all of our storage stuff in the laundry room, crawl space, and maybe a little bit in the office.
If you saw how many boxes and bins we have, you would realize that is currently impossible.
I have realized that, really, we shouldn't need storage space. Not much of it, anyway. With the exception of baby stuff we are saving for the next child (which we have too much of), if we don't use this stuff, why do we even have it? Why are we letting bins and bins of stuff take up space in our home? It's weighing me down, mentally and physically.
So I'm getting rid of crap.
I started with half my wardrobe. That's right, I gave 50% of my clothing to goodwill. I got rid of all my clothes that are nice, but don't fit. I got rid of all my clothes that fit well and flatter my figure, but I never wear. I got rid of all the stuff that I don't wear, but I might wear someday. Because I finally got it through my head that even if I might wear it someday, that doesn't mean I need to wear it someday. I have other clothes I can wear instead.
Everything left in my closet and drawers are clothes I have worn in the past year (allowing for seasonal changes, and minus my maternity wear which I haven't worn for 15 months but will be wearing again one day, hopefully). It makes me feel free. I want to get rid of more! As someone who always had the hardest time parting with clothing, finally getting rid of stuff is addicting! I'm forcing myself to take my time with some of the clothes, because I don't want to regret getting rid of something. But I could really get rid of a lot more. My ultimate goal in this area is to be able to fit both Justin's and my clothes in our walk-in closet, which currently only holds my clothes. Justin has his own double closet in the upstairs spare room (yeah... we need to work on that).
I am also getting rid of other stuff we don't need. Things I packed away when I was decluttering... what's the point in keeping it? I don't need a box full of fun and fancy coffee mugs. I never used them in the 3 years they sat in the cupboard, and I have 16 coffee mugs left that belong in my dishware set. The stereos and CD players I haven't used in ages... why keep them? The old TV taking up space in the office? We will never use it, let someone else have it.
I have a plan in my head to go through the bins that were tranferred here from my parents house and be ruthless. I have three bins filled with memorabilia. I think I could whittle it down to one. Two, at the most.
I'm not sure what to do with the $7000 worth of university books and texts. I wish I had sold them to the used bookstore on campus after I was done with them. I kept them out of pride. I read every single word in every single one of those books! And there are hundreds of books! Most of them are in perfect condition, but as far as I know there's no market for these books at the second hand bookstore where I live. I might be able to donate them to a library, but I really wish I could get some sort of profit from them. Making some money on them would make it easier to part with them.
I need to convince Justin to get rid of some of his boxes, too. I might just do it for him. He doesn't even know what's down there, so what would it hurt?
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Be Gentle - Things I Don't Want to Forget
Noah is very good at being "gentle." He loves to stroke, pet, and hug things (his toys, me, the cats...) When he's being rough (which isn't very often and never just for the sake of being aggressive), he doesn't respond very well to "Don't hit" or "Don't push", but he responds wonderfully to "Be gentle..." He will stop whatever he's doing and start petting and stroking what he was being rough with, even if it was a window.
He's been doing this thing for the past month where he looks at me and smacks himself in the head. It's usually when he's frustrated or knows he was bad. This really freaked me out at the beginning, but the more I paid attention to it and said "Don't hit yourself!" the more he kept doing it.
So now, when he hits himself in the head (which now makes me laugh) I say "Ohh, be gentle Noah, be gentle..." And he starts gently rubbing his head instead.
It slays me.
He's been doing this thing for the past month where he looks at me and smacks himself in the head. It's usually when he's frustrated or knows he was bad. This really freaked me out at the beginning, but the more I paid attention to it and said "Don't hit yourself!" the more he kept doing it.
So now, when he hits himself in the head (which now makes me laugh) I say "Ohh, be gentle Noah, be gentle..." And he starts gently rubbing his head instead.
It slays me.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Insomnia and Noah's Skin
I am on my third night in a row of lying awake in the middle of the night for hours. This is a regular occurance for me, but it's been awhile since it has happened every night for days. A few months ago it was happening 5 nights a week or so, but it's been good for awhile. I am seriously bothered by it. I hate lying awake, and I hate being exhausted during the day because of it. I really feel like smashing my head against the wall when this happens.
I think its the stupid heat. Is it only where I live that within a few days you can go from freezing temperatures with the wind chill to 45 degrees with the humidex? For you US dwellers (pretty much all of you) that is 113 stinkin degrees. Of course I have the a/c on, but I find it hard to let myself set it below 72 degrees at night. I like to sleep in a 60 degree house. I have an extremely hard time adjusting to sleeping in a house thats in the 70s, wearing less clothes, having only a thin sheet on...
I just want to sleep! My body is so stupid!
I figured I would do an update on Noah's skin thingy. I've been meaning to do it but haven't found the time.
Noah most certainly does not have tinea versicolor. By third night of the Selsun treatment he was screaming in pain when the Selsun got on his skin. It took me until the fifth night to be positive that was why he was screaming. By then, as soon as the Selsun got on his skin and had time to react with it (a period of about 30 seconds), his whole body was tensed up and he was panicked and screaming. Furthermore, by the fifth night his skin was about 10 times worse than before I started. It was brutal, and looked so painful.
I did some more research online and became pretty darn positive that what he has actually is eczema. And Erin's Doctor-Mother told me to put a harsh chemical on his dry skin for 15 minutes every night, causing him extreme pain and exacerbating the problem.
Needless to say, I was pissed. I'd been treating it like it was eczema since the dry patches appeared over 6 months ago. And even with the major moisturizing I was never able to get rid of the dry patches. Now it was 10 times worse and really painful for him - how was I supposed to get rid of it now??
I decided to go to natural route, since prescription steroid creams for eczema eventually start to thin the skin and can even make the eczema problem worse. I decided to try pure coconut oil and ozone gel. I'd heard they do great things for skin. After deciding on that, I looked it up and both are things people use for eczema and have great results with.
So I've been using this new skin regimen since Saturday morning. First I slather his body in organic, non-processed coconut oil. Then I apply a regular baby lotion on top to kind of seal it in (I found this works better than just putting the coconut oil on). Then I apply ozone gel on each dry spot. I do it all twice a day - in the morning and before bed.
It's only been 5 days and his skin is drastically improved. It's really amazing. A lot of his dry patches, many of which were bright red and the size of my palm after the Selsun treatment, are almost gone. He has a few spots that are still visible, but they're each smaller than a quarter.
I'm so happy. Before trying this I was always using baby lotion and vaseline several times a day on Noah's skin, and I would barely see a difference. After only 5 days of using coconut oil and ozone gel his skin is probably 90% better. And I'm only using natural, organic products on it.
Lesson? Don't get diagnosed in your neighbour's driveway.
I think its the stupid heat. Is it only where I live that within a few days you can go from freezing temperatures with the wind chill to 45 degrees with the humidex? For you US dwellers (pretty much all of you) that is 113 stinkin degrees. Of course I have the a/c on, but I find it hard to let myself set it below 72 degrees at night. I like to sleep in a 60 degree house. I have an extremely hard time adjusting to sleeping in a house thats in the 70s, wearing less clothes, having only a thin sheet on...
I just want to sleep! My body is so stupid!
I figured I would do an update on Noah's skin thingy. I've been meaning to do it but haven't found the time.
Noah most certainly does not have tinea versicolor. By third night of the Selsun treatment he was screaming in pain when the Selsun got on his skin. It took me until the fifth night to be positive that was why he was screaming. By then, as soon as the Selsun got on his skin and had time to react with it (a period of about 30 seconds), his whole body was tensed up and he was panicked and screaming. Furthermore, by the fifth night his skin was about 10 times worse than before I started. It was brutal, and looked so painful.
I did some more research online and became pretty darn positive that what he has actually is eczema. And Erin's Doctor-Mother told me to put a harsh chemical on his dry skin for 15 minutes every night, causing him extreme pain and exacerbating the problem.
Needless to say, I was pissed. I'd been treating it like it was eczema since the dry patches appeared over 6 months ago. And even with the major moisturizing I was never able to get rid of the dry patches. Now it was 10 times worse and really painful for him - how was I supposed to get rid of it now??
I decided to go to natural route, since prescription steroid creams for eczema eventually start to thin the skin and can even make the eczema problem worse. I decided to try pure coconut oil and ozone gel. I'd heard they do great things for skin. After deciding on that, I looked it up and both are things people use for eczema and have great results with.
So I've been using this new skin regimen since Saturday morning. First I slather his body in organic, non-processed coconut oil. Then I apply a regular baby lotion on top to kind of seal it in (I found this works better than just putting the coconut oil on). Then I apply ozone gel on each dry spot. I do it all twice a day - in the morning and before bed.
It's only been 5 days and his skin is drastically improved. It's really amazing. A lot of his dry patches, many of which were bright red and the size of my palm after the Selsun treatment, are almost gone. He has a few spots that are still visible, but they're each smaller than a quarter.
I'm so happy. Before trying this I was always using baby lotion and vaseline several times a day on Noah's skin, and I would barely see a difference. After only 5 days of using coconut oil and ozone gel his skin is probably 90% better. And I'm only using natural, organic products on it.
Lesson? Don't get diagnosed in your neighbour's driveway.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
60th Anniversary
It was my grandparents' 60th anniversary this weekend. We had a big party after church, at the church, with about 60 family members there.
I was a bit concerned about how it would go with Noah since he got up at 7am and wouldn't be able to nap until way late in the day. I hoped he would fall asleep nursing in church like he did a couple of weeks ago, but knew that he wouldn't (especially since that's what I wanted). He didn't, of course, and he was being kind of loud in church, so I took him to the nursery to play. He was pretty much ignoring me in there, so I thought I would go back into church. I told the nursery volunteers, "Seriously, I'm sitting in the back, come get me for ANYTHING. Even if he's just whimpering." Noah has a long history with separation and stranger anxiety. He is getting a lot better as he gets older, but still, I don't want to force Noah to be in the nursery if he's not comfortable. I only want him to be in there if thats where he wants to be.
I get back into church and sit down with Justin, and after a bit I hear really faint crying. I'm listening soooo closely, because I think it sounds like Noah (there were over 10 kids in the nursery though). So I'm listening really closely and after about 30 seconds I am totally sure that it's Noah. He has a really distinctive cry. I hurry back out of church, and sure enough, Noah is walking around the nursery screaming, tears streaming down his face. And nobody is doing anything.
I walk in and he walks toward me. As soon as I picked him up he was fine. He was just scared without me there. They were like, "He was fine for a few seconds after you left, but then he started crying."
WHAT THE HECK. Seriously, what did I say? I said COME GET ME FOR ANYTHING. ANYTHING. If he isn't 100% happy to be in the nursery, then I don't want to force him to be in there!
I was really annoyed. I stayed in the nursery for the rest of the service. But it just reinforced what I've been saying all along about why I haven't wanted to put Noah in the nursery (this is the first time I've attempted to leave him in there). The people who work in the nursery - there are different volunteers every week, but it's always the same story - they wait until its really bad before they get the parents. I know this, I have been a nursery volunteer since I was like 10. They always think the parents don't want to be bothered, even if you tell them to please bother you. So I don't want to put Noah in there because I don't want him to be crying and afraid that Mommy has abandoned him, or fussing and wanting to nurse, and they won't come get me or page me on the screen!! (they can put a number up on the screen so you know your kid needs you and they don't have to hunt through the congregation for you).
Anyway, on to the party. Noah was running around like crazy at the party to keep himself awake. He nursed a bunch of times, but finally he got really cuddly, and between 1:30 and 1:40 he had asked to nurse a few times again. I nursed him again then and he passed out.. We were just sitting in the middle of the loud hellowship hall, with 60 people around us, and he passed out. He'd been awake for almost 7 hours, which is a long time in the morning. It was really noisy, but it was so noisy that it was just like white noise. I held him and he nursed/napped for almost 40 minutes. Not a full hour nap, but it worked out.
We went to my parents' house afterward and we were there until 7. We got Noah in jammies before we left and he fell asleep in the car. I put in on the boob while we were still in the garage and then walked into the house and into the bedroom while I was nursing him. He stayed sleeping. He woke up briefly in the garage but closed his eyes as soon as he was on the boob. Boobs are so magical.
Now, the fence... Like I said last night, the posts were supposed to be put in this morning and our friends were coming tomorrow to build the fence. We have had a trailer full of wood sitting in our driveway in the hot sun for over 24 hours. This morning at 8:30, 15 minutes before post-hole guy was supposed to get to our house, we got a phone call. The guy's truck broke down. Apparently this happens often.
Maybe it's just me, but if I had a business that relied on a truck to get me and my equipment to my job sites, and my truck kept breaking down, I think I would buy a new truck. Like I said, that's just me, though.
I've been so stressed about it all day. The earliest the post hole guy would come now is Thursday. And we have no idea when we can get our friends out here to put up the fence, now. That leaves at least a week of wood just sitting out in the sun. After a couple of days of this, the fence boards would start to warp, after which they become unusable and unreturnable. We can't put the wood in the garage because Justin uses the garage to train clients everyday. So besides having no idea when our fence will get done, we also have the problem of over $800 worth of lumber getting ruined.
We discussed it at length with my brother, who works a lot of construction, and my Dad, and we decided the best plan is to wet the boards really well, put them under the deck, and cover them with a tarp. Hopefully they will not warp that way. The backyard gets a lot of sun, but they're under the deck under a tarp.
Justin spent 90 minutes unloading wood from the trailer and bringing it to the backyard. I was out there wetting each fence board one by one, both sides, for about 45 minutes. Not our idea of a fun evening.
I'm really annoyed about this fence business. And I tend to take my stress out on my husband. Not good.
I was a bit concerned about how it would go with Noah since he got up at 7am and wouldn't be able to nap until way late in the day. I hoped he would fall asleep nursing in church like he did a couple of weeks ago, but knew that he wouldn't (especially since that's what I wanted). He didn't, of course, and he was being kind of loud in church, so I took him to the nursery to play. He was pretty much ignoring me in there, so I thought I would go back into church. I told the nursery volunteers, "Seriously, I'm sitting in the back, come get me for ANYTHING. Even if he's just whimpering." Noah has a long history with separation and stranger anxiety. He is getting a lot better as he gets older, but still, I don't want to force Noah to be in the nursery if he's not comfortable. I only want him to be in there if thats where he wants to be.
I get back into church and sit down with Justin, and after a bit I hear really faint crying. I'm listening soooo closely, because I think it sounds like Noah (there were over 10 kids in the nursery though). So I'm listening really closely and after about 30 seconds I am totally sure that it's Noah. He has a really distinctive cry. I hurry back out of church, and sure enough, Noah is walking around the nursery screaming, tears streaming down his face. And nobody is doing anything.
I walk in and he walks toward me. As soon as I picked him up he was fine. He was just scared without me there. They were like, "He was fine for a few seconds after you left, but then he started crying."
WHAT THE HECK. Seriously, what did I say? I said COME GET ME FOR ANYTHING. ANYTHING. If he isn't 100% happy to be in the nursery, then I don't want to force him to be in there!
I was really annoyed. I stayed in the nursery for the rest of the service. But it just reinforced what I've been saying all along about why I haven't wanted to put Noah in the nursery (this is the first time I've attempted to leave him in there). The people who work in the nursery - there are different volunteers every week, but it's always the same story - they wait until its really bad before they get the parents. I know this, I have been a nursery volunteer since I was like 10. They always think the parents don't want to be bothered, even if you tell them to please bother you. So I don't want to put Noah in there because I don't want him to be crying and afraid that Mommy has abandoned him, or fussing and wanting to nurse, and they won't come get me or page me on the screen!! (they can put a number up on the screen so you know your kid needs you and they don't have to hunt through the congregation for you).
Anyway, on to the party. Noah was running around like crazy at the party to keep himself awake. He nursed a bunch of times, but finally he got really cuddly, and between 1:30 and 1:40 he had asked to nurse a few times again. I nursed him again then and he passed out.. We were just sitting in the middle of the loud hellowship hall, with 60 people around us, and he passed out. He'd been awake for almost 7 hours, which is a long time in the morning. It was really noisy, but it was so noisy that it was just like white noise. I held him and he nursed/napped for almost 40 minutes. Not a full hour nap, but it worked out.
We went to my parents' house afterward and we were there until 7. We got Noah in jammies before we left and he fell asleep in the car. I put in on the boob while we were still in the garage and then walked into the house and into the bedroom while I was nursing him. He stayed sleeping. He woke up briefly in the garage but closed his eyes as soon as he was on the boob. Boobs are so magical.
Now, the fence... Like I said last night, the posts were supposed to be put in this morning and our friends were coming tomorrow to build the fence. We have had a trailer full of wood sitting in our driveway in the hot sun for over 24 hours. This morning at 8:30, 15 minutes before post-hole guy was supposed to get to our house, we got a phone call. The guy's truck broke down. Apparently this happens often.
Maybe it's just me, but if I had a business that relied on a truck to get me and my equipment to my job sites, and my truck kept breaking down, I think I would buy a new truck. Like I said, that's just me, though.
I've been so stressed about it all day. The earliest the post hole guy would come now is Thursday. And we have no idea when we can get our friends out here to put up the fence, now. That leaves at least a week of wood just sitting out in the sun. After a couple of days of this, the fence boards would start to warp, after which they become unusable and unreturnable. We can't put the wood in the garage because Justin uses the garage to train clients everyday. So besides having no idea when our fence will get done, we also have the problem of over $800 worth of lumber getting ruined.
We discussed it at length with my brother, who works a lot of construction, and my Dad, and we decided the best plan is to wet the boards really well, put them under the deck, and cover them with a tarp. Hopefully they will not warp that way. The backyard gets a lot of sun, but they're under the deck under a tarp.
Justin spent 90 minutes unloading wood from the trailer and bringing it to the backyard. I was out there wetting each fence board one by one, both sides, for about 45 minutes. Not our idea of a fun evening.
I'm really annoyed about this fence business. And I tend to take my stress out on my husband. Not good.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Single Parenting - Almost Complete
My four full days of single parenting is almost over. Justin will be home in the morning.
It really hasn't been that bad. It's gone a lot better than I thought it would. It's actually been kind of nice in some ways. I haven't had to clean up after or cook for Justin. Thats been nice. I've also been able to do a lot of things that I don't normally do because I try to be home for the short periods of time when Justin is actually home (an hour here, an hour there...). Being home for an hour here and an hour there basically makes it so that I can't do anything, since we live in a small town and most of my friends, my family, and almost every store I would go to is 25 minutes away. I've been able to go run errands I wouldn't normally be able to run, and we've had dinner with my parents twice. They love this, of course.
While it has gone well, I am very glad that it's almost over. I feel like my nerves are fraying. I am sick of not having any help or moral support. Unfortunately tomorrow we are busy all day long with a celebration for my grandparents' 60th anniversary. Then Monday it's back to the regular schedule. I feel like I need a proper weekend with my husband home. Actually, at this point I almost feel like I need to go out and do something for myself, by myself, and leave Noah at home. I never do that, and I almost never have the desire to do that. But doing everything 100% by myself has gotten mentally exhausting. And Noah's teething and toddlerhood have been raring their ugly heads during the past 4 days.
The next adventure? We're putting a fence in. The posts are being put in tomorrow morning before church, and then on Monday we have friends coming to put the actual fence and gates up. The wood is sitting in my driveway right now. Yet another big project I have had to coordinate and deal with on my own.
I'm so glad I normally have a good, supportive husband living with me. It's much better than doing it all alone.
It really hasn't been that bad. It's gone a lot better than I thought it would. It's actually been kind of nice in some ways. I haven't had to clean up after or cook for Justin. Thats been nice. I've also been able to do a lot of things that I don't normally do because I try to be home for the short periods of time when Justin is actually home (an hour here, an hour there...). Being home for an hour here and an hour there basically makes it so that I can't do anything, since we live in a small town and most of my friends, my family, and almost every store I would go to is 25 minutes away. I've been able to go run errands I wouldn't normally be able to run, and we've had dinner with my parents twice. They love this, of course.
While it has gone well, I am very glad that it's almost over. I feel like my nerves are fraying. I am sick of not having any help or moral support. Unfortunately tomorrow we are busy all day long with a celebration for my grandparents' 60th anniversary. Then Monday it's back to the regular schedule. I feel like I need a proper weekend with my husband home. Actually, at this point I almost feel like I need to go out and do something for myself, by myself, and leave Noah at home. I never do that, and I almost never have the desire to do that. But doing everything 100% by myself has gotten mentally exhausting. And Noah's teething and toddlerhood have been raring their ugly heads during the past 4 days.
The next adventure? We're putting a fence in. The posts are being put in tomorrow morning before church, and then on Monday we have friends coming to put the actual fence and gates up. The wood is sitting in my driveway right now. Yet another big project I have had to coordinate and deal with on my own.
I'm so glad I normally have a good, supportive husband living with me. It's much better than doing it all alone.
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