One thing that all mothers can understand is the concept of Mommy Guilt. We all have it for various reasons; some of us have more reason then others to have Mommy Guilt; for some of us the feeling is stronger than for others.
One thing I've been working on lately is trying to get rid of the Mommy Guilt I feel when I do things that are against what "they" say you should do. "They" are the authors of almost every mainstream baby book and parenting website out there. Oh sure, many of them present themselves under the guise of being unbiased, but they really aren't.
One thing you will read in almost every parenting book is not to nurse or rock your baby to sleep. They even suggest you do the ludicrous thing of waking your sleeping baby up if he falls asleep breastfeeding so that you can put him in his crib awake and he can fall asleep on his own. Pretty much any breastfeeding mother will tell you that this is insanity. Nobody is going to wake their child after they just got them to sleep. Besides the obvious reason of not being a crazy person who wakes up a sleeping baby, nursing your baby to sleep is natural. Studies have shown that nursing regulates a baby’s temperature, heart rate, and blood pressure and puts a baby to sleep. It is natural and normal for a baby to fall asleep at the breast. There is no need to wake a sleeping infant in order to force him into self-soothing.
The reason behind the advice of not nursing your baby to sleep is because "they" don't want baby to create a sleep association with nursing, so that the only way the baby will go to sleep is through nursing. There is some merit to this, but in most cases there is not enough merit to warrant waking your baby up if he falls asleep nursing. A better way to avoid a strict sleep association with nursing is to give your baby opportunity to fall asleep in different ways at different times: rocking, walking, bouncing, the stroller, the car, etc. The vast majority of babies can fall asleep in other ways, even if they are used to nursing themselves to sleep much of the time.
Now, the books will also say that you shouldn't soothe your baby to sleep at all, because then he won't soothe himself to sleep. "They" say that you should soothe your baby to the point of being calm, and then let baby fall asleep totally independently. I disagree with this. Sure, it works for some babies, and for those babies I say GO FOR IT! If your child is hardly bothered at all by going to sleep on his own, then by all means let him! But many babies are greatly bothered by that (like mine, who will scream hysterically for hours), and I believe that forcing a baby to fall asleep on his own before he's ready is cruel. "They" say that at 3 to 6 months a baby is ready to do this. Well, not necessarily. Some babies are great self soothers. Some babies are not. And by 6 months many babies still see being left alone in their crib as plain old abandonment, rather than an opportunity for some much needed sleep.
I don't see any reason why you shouldn't comfort and soothe your baby to sleep if that's what he needs. I don't think you're doing your child harm if you continue to comfort him at naptime and nighttime. If that's what works for you and your child, why should you change it? If you nurse your baby to sleep at night and he sleeps well the rest of the night, then obviously it is working for you. But all those "sleep trainers" out there would tell you to never parent your baby to sleep because as soon as you do it once, they expect it all the time. Personally, I feel sorry for the parents out there who never have the chance to cuddle with their sleeping baby because they listen to "them."
"They" made me feel guilty for my parenting style for 6 months. "They" made me feel like I was a bad parent for nursing, rocking, bouncing, or walking Noah to sleep for nearly all of his naps, and nursing him to sleep every night. "They" made me feel like I was doing my baby a disservice by comforting him when he cried and needed his Mommy when he should be sleeping.
I hate "them." "They" caused me to feel guilty for not being able to go through with the "harden-your-heart" approach to sleeping. "They" caused me to feel anxiety everytime my child woke up earlier than "they" said he should, because I was afraid that everything I did to help him fall back asleep when he couldn't do it himself was ruining his ability to ever fall back asleep on his own. "They" made me feel like I was ruining my baby's current and future sleep habits by choosing to actually parent him at night. "They" made me resent the awakenings and feel stressed out by them, when I really should have just been seeing them as a normal and natural part of parenting an infant. You're not just a parent in the daytime. You're a parent in the nighttime as well.
I recently found two experts that have made me feel so much better about the style of parenting that I'm comfortable with. One of them is Dr. Sears (supporter of attachment parenting), and one of them is the author of a random sleep site I found. Both of these experts have made me feel confident that I'm doing what's best for me and Noah, and I feel much more relaxed when things don't go perfectly at bedtime and throughout the night.
Every parent should do what's best for her and her babies and not feel guilty about it. What's best for me and Noah is for me to soothe him and parent him to sleep instead of abandoning him to figure it out on his own - because that's what it feels like to Noah: abandonment. I no longer feel entitled to sleep through the night, or to get up only once after he's been down for a prescribed amount of time. If it goes that way: awesome. If it doesn't, that's fine too. I'm not going to get stressed out and anxious about it. I'm a nighttime Mom as well as a daytime Mom.
And that's the way I like it.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Monday, September 27, 2010
My Kid Has Mad Skills
Noah is 6 months, 1 weeks, and 2 days old
This morning Noah discovered that he can do something that I knew he could do, but I was quite happy that he hadn't realized it yet:
He can now roll onto his stomach while he's swaddled.
This is not a welcome development in our household. He did this several times this morning and several times after naps throughout the day.
Not cool.
I truly wish I could strap him to his mattress and tape a soother to his face. I probably wouldn't have to get up all night!! *sigh* That would be wonderful.
I wonder when Noah will actually be able to sleep unswaddled and be fine? We have been back to swaddling for all of his naps (as well as nighttime) for about a week now. He seems much happier when going to sleep, and is having more frequent long naps (although we are still lucky when they happen, and they never happen more than once a day).
I'm extremely exhausted lately. Last week on Thursday and Friday it took me 45 minutes to get Noah down for each nap. Not to mention the hour and a half I spent trying to get him down for a nap that he never even ended up falling asleep for. At 3 or 4 naps a day, that's a lot of time to spend trying to get a baby to sleep. He was just so squirmy, even though I could tell from his eyes that he was tired.
By his last nap on Friday I just couldn't fight that battle anymore, so I nursed him to sleep. And then I did that for most of his naps for the past 3 days, as well. I just don't have the energy to rock a baby who's fighting sleep. I'm just so exhausted.
I don't know what it is. I haven't felt this tired since Noah was in his first couple of months and I would only get 2-3 hours of sleep in each 24 hour period. He was getting up to nurse literally every hour or two all night long, and I wasn't able to fall back asleep in between nursings. It took at least a month before he finally started doing a 3 hour stretch at the beginning of the night, and even then it was still every hour or hour and a half all night after that. The only time I would get any sleep would be the first part of the night. I would nurse Noah, then send him downstairs with Justin so I could get maybe 2 hours of sleep at once. Then Justin would come upstairs with Noah and wake me up again because he'd be hungry. I would be at my most tired during those periods because I was just woken up out of a deep sleep (something I rarely get). Sometimes I would just sit there and cry while I was nursing him because I was so exhausted from exisiting on such little sleep for so many weeks.
That's how tired I felt today. When Justin came home from work he took Noah and let me have a 45 minute nap. That was only, like, my third nap since Noah was born more than 6 months ago. I could have slept for hours, but I forced myself awake so that I'll be able to sleep tonight.
I don't know why I'm so tired lately, but I am. Maybe it's because I've been staying up until 9:30 every night and Justin and Noah wake me up by 6:30 every morning. And I'm not sleeping that whole time, obviously. I've always been a person who needs 9 hours a night to not be tired, and I think I'm getting about 7, total. It's not terrible - in fact, it's pretty good now that I drug myself with gravol and antihistamines every night and can get more than 4 or 5 hours - but it's not quite enough for me. Maybe I'm getting just enough sleep to make my body think "Oh, I can finally feel tired, I don't have to exist on adrenaline," but not enough to actually feel rested.
I'm feeling tired again, despite my nap. Hopefully I can get to bed earlier than 9:30!
This morning Noah discovered that he can do something that I knew he could do, but I was quite happy that he hadn't realized it yet:
He can now roll onto his stomach while he's swaddled.
This is not a welcome development in our household. He did this several times this morning and several times after naps throughout the day.
Not cool.
I truly wish I could strap him to his mattress and tape a soother to his face. I probably wouldn't have to get up all night!! *sigh* That would be wonderful.
I wonder when Noah will actually be able to sleep unswaddled and be fine? We have been back to swaddling for all of his naps (as well as nighttime) for about a week now. He seems much happier when going to sleep, and is having more frequent long naps (although we are still lucky when they happen, and they never happen more than once a day).
I'm extremely exhausted lately. Last week on Thursday and Friday it took me 45 minutes to get Noah down for each nap. Not to mention the hour and a half I spent trying to get him down for a nap that he never even ended up falling asleep for. At 3 or 4 naps a day, that's a lot of time to spend trying to get a baby to sleep. He was just so squirmy, even though I could tell from his eyes that he was tired.
By his last nap on Friday I just couldn't fight that battle anymore, so I nursed him to sleep. And then I did that for most of his naps for the past 3 days, as well. I just don't have the energy to rock a baby who's fighting sleep. I'm just so exhausted.
I don't know what it is. I haven't felt this tired since Noah was in his first couple of months and I would only get 2-3 hours of sleep in each 24 hour period. He was getting up to nurse literally every hour or two all night long, and I wasn't able to fall back asleep in between nursings. It took at least a month before he finally started doing a 3 hour stretch at the beginning of the night, and even then it was still every hour or hour and a half all night after that. The only time I would get any sleep would be the first part of the night. I would nurse Noah, then send him downstairs with Justin so I could get maybe 2 hours of sleep at once. Then Justin would come upstairs with Noah and wake me up again because he'd be hungry. I would be at my most tired during those periods because I was just woken up out of a deep sleep (something I rarely get). Sometimes I would just sit there and cry while I was nursing him because I was so exhausted from exisiting on such little sleep for so many weeks.
That's how tired I felt today. When Justin came home from work he took Noah and let me have a 45 minute nap. That was only, like, my third nap since Noah was born more than 6 months ago. I could have slept for hours, but I forced myself awake so that I'll be able to sleep tonight.
I don't know why I'm so tired lately, but I am. Maybe it's because I've been staying up until 9:30 every night and Justin and Noah wake me up by 6:30 every morning. And I'm not sleeping that whole time, obviously. I've always been a person who needs 9 hours a night to not be tired, and I think I'm getting about 7, total. It's not terrible - in fact, it's pretty good now that I drug myself with gravol and antihistamines every night and can get more than 4 or 5 hours - but it's not quite enough for me. Maybe I'm getting just enough sleep to make my body think "Oh, I can finally feel tired, I don't have to exist on adrenaline," but not enough to actually feel rested.
I'm feeling tired again, despite my nap. Hopefully I can get to bed earlier than 9:30!
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Awake Time Record
I pretty sure Noah set a personal record for awake time today. Since he wouldn't go down for a fourth nap and I didn't want to put him down insanely early and then have him wake up insanely early and get into a brutal cycle like that, he ended up being awake from 1:50pm to 7:00pm.
5 hours and 10 minutes. At 6 months and 5 days old. For a baby who only has little cat naps and usually goes to sleep after an awake time of an hour and 45 minutes to two hours.
That is a long time.
5 hours and 10 minutes. At 6 months and 5 days old. For a baby who only has little cat naps and usually goes to sleep after an awake time of an hour and 45 minutes to two hours.
That is a long time.
Third Tooth!
(Noah is 6 weeks and 5 days old)
I just saw that Noah has a third tooth! I didn't even know he was cutting one! It's on the left side of his two bottom teeth, and looks at least 3 or 4 days old when I compare it to how big his first two teeth were at that stage. But I guess teeth can grow at different rates.
I wonder when this happened.
I feel guilty that I didn't notice until now. I know I've checked his gums within the last week, so it happened sometime since then. I wonder if this accounts for some of his recent fussiness in the past week. And perhaps some of his fussiness that I attributed to his shots two days ago? Perhaps even the night wakings the past two nights were because of the tooth. Who knows.
My little baby is growing up so fast...
I just saw that Noah has a third tooth! I didn't even know he was cutting one! It's on the left side of his two bottom teeth, and looks at least 3 or 4 days old when I compare it to how big his first two teeth were at that stage. But I guess teeth can grow at different rates.
I wonder when this happened.
I feel guilty that I didn't notice until now. I know I've checked his gums within the last week, so it happened sometime since then. I wonder if this accounts for some of his recent fussiness in the past week. And perhaps some of his fussiness that I attributed to his shots two days ago? Perhaps even the night wakings the past two nights were because of the tooth. Who knows.
My little baby is growing up so fast...
Sleep, Sleep, and More Sleep... or a Lack of Sleep
(6 months 5 days)
-Yesterday Noah had 3 long naps of an hour to an hour and 20 minutes each. That's the first time he's done that since he was tiny.
-Last night Noah was asleep at 7:40. This was about a half hour later than the night before, but strangely he woke up crying again at exactly 8:12 - that was the exact time he woke up crying the night before. I left him because it was off and on, and it wasn't hysterical, so I wanted to see if he would put himself to sleep. He did within about 5 minutes. He didn't wake up again until 12:45, when he was almost fully awake. He wasn't hungry, he was just lying there awake and fussing. I comforted him for awhile, but I was exhausted. Once he was totally calm I laid him back in his crib, eyes open, and went to bed myself. He never made another peep, so he put himself to sleep. The next time I heard him was 6:08, and then not again until 6:40. I got him out of his crib to eat at 6:40. I pretended it was still the middle of the night because he hadn't even slept for 11 hours total. He wasn't fooled, and never went back to sleep.
-Now it's past 5pm and he's only had three 30-40 minute naps today. In almost 11 hours. He's been awake since 1:50 but he won't go to sleep for a fourth nap. I've been trying for an hour and a half. He just won't sleep. At one point I almost thought he was going to when I was nursing him, and then he pooped. The kid poops once every 3 or 4 days, and he chooses THEN to poop?
-I'm home alone until 7, when Justin gets home. I'm really looking forward to spending the evening by myself with a cranky overtired baby.
-Yesterday Noah had 3 long naps of an hour to an hour and 20 minutes each. That's the first time he's done that since he was tiny.
-Last night Noah was asleep at 7:40. This was about a half hour later than the night before, but strangely he woke up crying again at exactly 8:12 - that was the exact time he woke up crying the night before. I left him because it was off and on, and it wasn't hysterical, so I wanted to see if he would put himself to sleep. He did within about 5 minutes. He didn't wake up again until 12:45, when he was almost fully awake. He wasn't hungry, he was just lying there awake and fussing. I comforted him for awhile, but I was exhausted. Once he was totally calm I laid him back in his crib, eyes open, and went to bed myself. He never made another peep, so he put himself to sleep. The next time I heard him was 6:08, and then not again until 6:40. I got him out of his crib to eat at 6:40. I pretended it was still the middle of the night because he hadn't even slept for 11 hours total. He wasn't fooled, and never went back to sleep.
-Now it's past 5pm and he's only had three 30-40 minute naps today. In almost 11 hours. He's been awake since 1:50 but he won't go to sleep for a fourth nap. I've been trying for an hour and a half. He just won't sleep. At one point I almost thought he was going to when I was nursing him, and then he pooped. The kid poops once every 3 or 4 days, and he chooses THEN to poop?
-I'm home alone until 7, when Justin gets home. I'm really looking forward to spending the evening by myself with a cranky overtired baby.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Boo
Well, we had 4 great nights in a row after we started the swaddling. Last night was not great. He was asleep by 7:30, and at 8:12 he started crying. I let him cry for a couple of minutes but the cry was different from that muted "sleep cry" that he often falls asleep on his own from. I didn't want to start giving him a soother multiple times a night again, so I tried to soothe him in other ways.
He was still sleeping and his eyes stayed shut, so I tried to comfort him without giving him a soother. I kissed his cheeks (which often calms him), stroked his head, picked him up and held him to my shoulder (he quieted, but he kept squirming, even though his eyes were shut), and then cradled him in my arms... that made it worse. So I just gave him a soother and he was fine.
Then he woke me up crying again at 11:15. He was more awake this time, so I just gave him a soother and kissed his cheeks and he went back to sleep. I, on the other hand, took a lot longer to fall back asleep.
Then he woke up crying again at 3:30. I fed him, he went back to sleep.
Then this morning he woke up at 6:40 and started crying quite a bit. I left him for 15 minutes because I was sooo tired and I hoped he would just go back to sleep. But by the time I went to him at 6:55 the crying was a lot worse. I always know that he's not ready to be up for the day by how he greets me. He didn't smile at all, he was just crying. So I gave him a soother again and kissed his cheeks... again. He eventually fell back asleep until 7:30, when he woke up crying AGAIN. But this time he was up for the day.
I really hope we're not getting into that again. Before I swaddle-weaned him I was always having to give him a soother because he would cry and cry in his sleep, but he wasn't hungry, so I didn't want to feed him. This would happen a couple of times before the time of night that he would get hungry. Then when I swaddle-weaned him he would need a soother a few times a night because he would roll over, and if he was still sleepy enough I would just leave him in his crib but give him a soother to help him fall asleep. But since I started swaddling him again, after I put him in his crib he has been good for at least 8 hours. I haven't had to go in to him once besides when he wakes up to eat after 8-10 hours. I REALLY hope we're not backsliding again.
I would like to break this habit, but I can't just not give him a soother. Both at 11:15 and 6:40 things just kept escalating as I left him. And I've experienced (and described) what things are like when I let them escalate. They get completely out of control and will stay that way for hours unless I interefere with my boobs.
I'm hoping it's just because of his shots yesterday. When I think about it, the last time he got like this it was after shots, too. Frickin shots. I HATE them. Because maybe it was just because of the shots that this starts, but then he gets used to it and it continues!!! I might have to start co-sleeping just so I can put a soother in his mouth without having to get up! lol.
Can I tape a soother to his face so it never falls out?
He was still sleeping and his eyes stayed shut, so I tried to comfort him without giving him a soother. I kissed his cheeks (which often calms him), stroked his head, picked him up and held him to my shoulder (he quieted, but he kept squirming, even though his eyes were shut), and then cradled him in my arms... that made it worse. So I just gave him a soother and he was fine.
Then he woke me up crying again at 11:15. He was more awake this time, so I just gave him a soother and kissed his cheeks and he went back to sleep. I, on the other hand, took a lot longer to fall back asleep.
Then he woke up crying again at 3:30. I fed him, he went back to sleep.
Then this morning he woke up at 6:40 and started crying quite a bit. I left him for 15 minutes because I was sooo tired and I hoped he would just go back to sleep. But by the time I went to him at 6:55 the crying was a lot worse. I always know that he's not ready to be up for the day by how he greets me. He didn't smile at all, he was just crying. So I gave him a soother again and kissed his cheeks... again. He eventually fell back asleep until 7:30, when he woke up crying AGAIN. But this time he was up for the day.
I really hope we're not getting into that again. Before I swaddle-weaned him I was always having to give him a soother because he would cry and cry in his sleep, but he wasn't hungry, so I didn't want to feed him. This would happen a couple of times before the time of night that he would get hungry. Then when I swaddle-weaned him he would need a soother a few times a night because he would roll over, and if he was still sleepy enough I would just leave him in his crib but give him a soother to help him fall asleep. But since I started swaddling him again, after I put him in his crib he has been good for at least 8 hours. I haven't had to go in to him once besides when he wakes up to eat after 8-10 hours. I REALLY hope we're not backsliding again.
I would like to break this habit, but I can't just not give him a soother. Both at 11:15 and 6:40 things just kept escalating as I left him. And I've experienced (and described) what things are like when I let them escalate. They get completely out of control and will stay that way for hours unless I interefere with my boobs.
I'm hoping it's just because of his shots yesterday. When I think about it, the last time he got like this it was after shots, too. Frickin shots. I HATE them. Because maybe it was just because of the shots that this starts, but then he gets used to it and it continues!!! I might have to start co-sleeping just so I can put a soother in his mouth without having to get up! lol.
Can I tape a soother to his face so it never falls out?
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Another Great Night, Thanks to Swaddling
Last night was another great night. Noah was asleep by 7:40 and slept all the way until 5, when he got up to nurse. He went straight back to bed and didn't make another peep until 8AM!! How fantastic is that?
He did cough on several occasions last night, and each time I worried that I would have to put him back to sleep, but I never had to. I'm not even sure if he actually woke up when he coughed.
I am still so amazed that he's back to sleeping so well. I'm really really thankful. We're still trying to figure out our days, though. Because of the 8am wake up time today, he only had 3 naps instead of four, because he woke up from his third nap at 3:50. That meant that he wouldn't be ready for his fourth nap until after 5:40 or so, and by the time he got to sleep he probably wouldn't wake up from it until 6:30. I'm not going to give him a 9 oclock bedtime just so I can give him 4 naps. So he stayed awake until 7, when bathtime was done and I started nursing him to sleep. I guess some days we'll have 4 naps and some days we'll have 3 naps. I would have liked to have more of a schedule, since my research on naps and bedtime said that if you have consistent nap times then the baby's circadian rhythms make them tired at those times, making it easier for them to sleep. But Noah's not a good napper, so I'm not about to wake him up in the morning before he would have woken up on his own just to hopefully have a nap schedule. Makes no sense for our situation.
I also read in my research that daytime sleep is controlled by a different area of the brain than nightime sleep. I did not know that! But it makes so much sense, since generally Noah is a great nighttime sleeper and a not-so-great daytime sleeper. I always wondered about that dichotomy.
I slept pretty good once I finally fell asleep at midnight last night. I tried to go to bed at 9:30, and I was exhausted, but I couldn't sleep because I was feeling so anxious. Usually my anxiety like that happens when I'm lying awake in the middle of the night, but lately I've had more episodes at the beginning of the night. I have a doctor's appointment at the same time as Noah's on Tuesday, so I'll see what he says. I've mentioned before that last time I had anxiety like this surrounding sleep I had to go on antidepressants to make it go away - and it did. I don't really want to do on antidepressants, because the ones that are safe when breastfeeding also have a possible side effect of insomnia... yeah, that's the LAST thing an insomniac needs.
He did cough on several occasions last night, and each time I worried that I would have to put him back to sleep, but I never had to. I'm not even sure if he actually woke up when he coughed.
I am still so amazed that he's back to sleeping so well. I'm really really thankful. We're still trying to figure out our days, though. Because of the 8am wake up time today, he only had 3 naps instead of four, because he woke up from his third nap at 3:50. That meant that he wouldn't be ready for his fourth nap until after 5:40 or so, and by the time he got to sleep he probably wouldn't wake up from it until 6:30. I'm not going to give him a 9 oclock bedtime just so I can give him 4 naps. So he stayed awake until 7, when bathtime was done and I started nursing him to sleep. I guess some days we'll have 4 naps and some days we'll have 3 naps. I would have liked to have more of a schedule, since my research on naps and bedtime said that if you have consistent nap times then the baby's circadian rhythms make them tired at those times, making it easier for them to sleep. But Noah's not a good napper, so I'm not about to wake him up in the morning before he would have woken up on his own just to hopefully have a nap schedule. Makes no sense for our situation.
I also read in my research that daytime sleep is controlled by a different area of the brain than nightime sleep. I did not know that! But it makes so much sense, since generally Noah is a great nighttime sleeper and a not-so-great daytime sleeper. I always wondered about that dichotomy.
I slept pretty good once I finally fell asleep at midnight last night. I tried to go to bed at 9:30, and I was exhausted, but I couldn't sleep because I was feeling so anxious. Usually my anxiety like that happens when I'm lying awake in the middle of the night, but lately I've had more episodes at the beginning of the night. I have a doctor's appointment at the same time as Noah's on Tuesday, so I'll see what he says. I've mentioned before that last time I had anxiety like this surrounding sleep I had to go on antidepressants to make it go away - and it did. I don't really want to do on antidepressants, because the ones that are safe when breastfeeding also have a possible side effect of insomnia... yeah, that's the LAST thing an insomniac needs.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
6 Months Old!
Here's where Noah is at 6 months old:
-Noah weighs 18lbs pretty much bang on. This is about 60th percentile according to the chart I've been following, and 75th percentile according to the Dr.
-He is 29 inches long (over 100th percentile)
-He wears mostly 12 month clothes, although we have some 6-9 month sleepers that are extremely long and still fit him fine.
-He wears size 3 diapers all the time - this just started a few days before 6 months.
-He has his two bottom teeth; they came in at 5 months and 1 weeks, exactly.
-Noah is still exclusively breastfed - no solids or bottles.
-He nurses about every 2 to 2 1/2 hours during the day.
-He's very distractable while nursing. We have to be somewhere quiet, otherwise he pops off to look around. No people or TV.
-When he's nursing he always strokes my chest over and over again. He just rubs circles on it. Very cute. He also reaches up to touch my face.
-He is very difficult to diaper. He's constantly twisting and trying to flip over. It's like a wrestling match everytime. Gone are the days where he actually helped with his diaper changes by putting his legs in the exact right position at the right time.
-He naps for 30-40 minutes three or four times a day. We were trying to transition down to 3 naps that were hopefully longer, but it didn't work out so we're back up to 4 naps.
-He has awake periods of about 2 hours, a little longer right before bedtime.
-He was down to sleeping about 10.5 hours a night total when he wasn't swaddled, waking up and needing to eat or be soothed back to sleep several times a night. I'm hoping that is over now that we're swaddling again.
-He is back to being swaddled at night and for naps because he was constantly turning over onto his tummy in his crib and fully waking up because of it. He couldn't get himself back to sleep after waking up so fully, and nighttime was torture for all of us. So swaddling made a comeback.
-He had a bedtime of 7pm (or even earlier) for most of his 6th month. Bedtime is now later somedays - 7-8pm - because we brought back his fourth nap.
-He started having earlier and earlier wake up times, so that for the last couple of weeks of his sixth month he was waking at 5:45 every morning. This seems to be corrected by the reintroduction of swaddling at night. Wake up time now seems to be 7am.
-He is a very good sitter, and can sit for several minutes on his own, although I would never leave him sitting on a hard surface without me there to catch him if he fell. Eventually he decides he wants to get something out of his reach and pitches forward or sideways and smashes his head. He rarely just falls though, it's generally his own fault because he leaned too far.
-He can creep really far really fast. He is very smart when deciding how to quickly get to a toy that's out of his reach, even if it's really far away. He uses both arms and legs to move around now. A month ago it was pretty much just legs. Now he can plant his hands down when he's on a hard surface, press really hard, and just pull himself forward with arm strength. But he generally uses both arms and legs at the same time, making him quite fast. I see top-of-the-stair gates needing to go up in the next month.
-He is a total pro at rolling from back to front, and does it every chance he gets.
-He is now starting to roll from front to back more often (although when compared with back to front, it's probably only a 1:10 ratio). It doesn't seem to be a mistake anymore - it's more deliberate.
-He's not as obsessed with standing as he used to be, although he does enjoy it.
-He doesn't "babble," but he talks. For consanants sounds, he says m, l, g (hard), k, h. He loves to stare at you, smiling, and say "ggggggg" from his throat. He also says "Mum!" indiscriminately sometimes.
-He has the cutest baby giggles and laughs.
-He smiles pretty easily.
-Noah loves playing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes." He gets a huge smile on his face when I start, and often giggles throughout the songs.
-He loves playing peekaboo, and he can pull the burp cloth off his face himself now. When he sees it's about to go over his head he gets this giant smile on his face, breathes really fast, and gets crazy legs. He loves when he pulls the cloth off and I say "Peekaboo! Hi!!! Yaaaaay!!!"
-His breath still smells gloriously yummy, like sweet, sweet apples.
-He is extremely drooly, and has a bib on pretty much all the time.
-He loves to watch the cats, and always wants to touch them. The interest is not mutual.
-He puts everything in his mouth, much more so than other babies his age that we spend time around (there's 4 of them).
-He hangs out with Aubrey, Colton, and Bredan and Morrigan (twins).
-He loves his jolly jumper and jumperoo.
-He hardly ever uses his play mat anymore because he immediately rolls onto his tummy and creeps off of it.
-He cannot, under any circumstances, be left on any elevated surface without being watched pretty much every second. He can creep to the edge of our king sized bed very quickly. He also tries to roll out of his swing and bouncy chair, and totally would if we let him do so.
-He slams his legs around all the time. When I put him in bed I often have to pin his legs down because he lifts them up and slams them down on the mattress over and over, which will usually wake him up.
-About a week ago we had this hilarious night with Noah in the jolly jumper. He was so hyper, and Justin was kicking his plush soccer ball at him pretending he was a goalie. Noah would jump like mad, and when Justin would say "Ready????" it sounded like Noah was going "Uh huh!" He would stop jumping with stiff legs and wait for the ball. If the ball would hit his legs he would laugh hysterically. It was out of control. One of the funniest moments of our parenting career.
-Noah weighs 18lbs pretty much bang on. This is about 60th percentile according to the chart I've been following, and 75th percentile according to the Dr.
-He is 29 inches long (over 100th percentile)
-He wears mostly 12 month clothes, although we have some 6-9 month sleepers that are extremely long and still fit him fine.
-He wears size 3 diapers all the time - this just started a few days before 6 months.
-He has his two bottom teeth; they came in at 5 months and 1 weeks, exactly.
-Noah is still exclusively breastfed - no solids or bottles.
-He nurses about every 2 to 2 1/2 hours during the day.
-He's very distractable while nursing. We have to be somewhere quiet, otherwise he pops off to look around. No people or TV.
-When he's nursing he always strokes my chest over and over again. He just rubs circles on it. Very cute. He also reaches up to touch my face.
-He is very difficult to diaper. He's constantly twisting and trying to flip over. It's like a wrestling match everytime. Gone are the days where he actually helped with his diaper changes by putting his legs in the exact right position at the right time.
-He naps for 30-40 minutes three or four times a day. We were trying to transition down to 3 naps that were hopefully longer, but it didn't work out so we're back up to 4 naps.
-He has awake periods of about 2 hours, a little longer right before bedtime.
-He was down to sleeping about 10.5 hours a night total when he wasn't swaddled, waking up and needing to eat or be soothed back to sleep several times a night. I'm hoping that is over now that we're swaddling again.
-He is back to being swaddled at night and for naps because he was constantly turning over onto his tummy in his crib and fully waking up because of it. He couldn't get himself back to sleep after waking up so fully, and nighttime was torture for all of us. So swaddling made a comeback.
-He had a bedtime of 7pm (or even earlier) for most of his 6th month. Bedtime is now later somedays - 7-8pm - because we brought back his fourth nap.
-He started having earlier and earlier wake up times, so that for the last couple of weeks of his sixth month he was waking at 5:45 every morning. This seems to be corrected by the reintroduction of swaddling at night. Wake up time now seems to be 7am.
-He is a very good sitter, and can sit for several minutes on his own, although I would never leave him sitting on a hard surface without me there to catch him if he fell. Eventually he decides he wants to get something out of his reach and pitches forward or sideways and smashes his head. He rarely just falls though, it's generally his own fault because he leaned too far.
-He can creep really far really fast. He is very smart when deciding how to quickly get to a toy that's out of his reach, even if it's really far away. He uses both arms and legs to move around now. A month ago it was pretty much just legs. Now he can plant his hands down when he's on a hard surface, press really hard, and just pull himself forward with arm strength. But he generally uses both arms and legs at the same time, making him quite fast. I see top-of-the-stair gates needing to go up in the next month.
-He is a total pro at rolling from back to front, and does it every chance he gets.
-He is now starting to roll from front to back more often (although when compared with back to front, it's probably only a 1:10 ratio). It doesn't seem to be a mistake anymore - it's more deliberate.
-He's not as obsessed with standing as he used to be, although he does enjoy it.
-He doesn't "babble," but he talks. For consanants sounds, he says m, l, g (hard), k, h. He loves to stare at you, smiling, and say "ggggggg" from his throat. He also says "Mum!" indiscriminately sometimes.
-He has the cutest baby giggles and laughs.
-He smiles pretty easily.
-Noah loves playing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes." He gets a huge smile on his face when I start, and often giggles throughout the songs.
-He loves playing peekaboo, and he can pull the burp cloth off his face himself now. When he sees it's about to go over his head he gets this giant smile on his face, breathes really fast, and gets crazy legs. He loves when he pulls the cloth off and I say "Peekaboo! Hi!!! Yaaaaay!!!"
-His breath still smells gloriously yummy, like sweet, sweet apples.
-He is extremely drooly, and has a bib on pretty much all the time.
-He loves to watch the cats, and always wants to touch them. The interest is not mutual.
-He puts everything in his mouth, much more so than other babies his age that we spend time around (there's 4 of them).
-He hangs out with Aubrey, Colton, and Bredan and Morrigan (twins).
-He loves his jolly jumper and jumperoo.
-He hardly ever uses his play mat anymore because he immediately rolls onto his tummy and creeps off of it.
-He cannot, under any circumstances, be left on any elevated surface without being watched pretty much every second. He can creep to the edge of our king sized bed very quickly. He also tries to roll out of his swing and bouncy chair, and totally would if we let him do so.
-He slams his legs around all the time. When I put him in bed I often have to pin his legs down because he lifts them up and slams them down on the mattress over and over, which will usually wake him up.
-About a week ago we had this hilarious night with Noah in the jolly jumper. He was so hyper, and Justin was kicking his plush soccer ball at him pretending he was a goalie. Noah would jump like mad, and when Justin would say "Ready????" it sounded like Noah was going "Uh huh!" He would stop jumping with stiff legs and wait for the ball. If the ball would hit his legs he would laugh hysterically. It was out of control. One of the funniest moments of our parenting career.
Mama Knows Best... Again
The swaddling worked. Last night was glorious. Noah was asleep by 8:15 and in bed by 8:25. It was a later bedtime than usual because he woke up from his last nap at 2:30, and instead of being obsessed with having an early bedtime and therefore not giving him a fourth nap, I decided he would HAVE that fourth nap, even if he didn't go down for it until 5:05. Even if I did have to wake him up at 5:50 because he was still sleeping soundly and would have probably stayed conked out until 6:30. (Man I felt guilty waking him up... I've never done that before! He was groggy for awhile.)
Anyway, with the minor exception of waking up and crying for 30 seconds at 10pm (and falling right back to sleep) he slept from 8:15 until 5:30. I changed his bum, re-swaddled him, nursed him for 10 minutes, and he felt right back asleep. I heard him talking to himself around 6:30, but because he was swaddled he couldn't roll over, so he fell back asleep. He then started fussing at 7:45 so I sent Justin to go get him.
It was a normal night again! I am so happy I made the decision to swaddle him again. He clearly still needs it.
Just as he clearly still needs his 4 crap naps everyday. I was trying to transition down to 3 naps, hoping he would have at least one good nap each day that would help this. He only occasionally did that though. So he always had a really early bedtime, which combined with no swaddling led to a really early wake up time, and a less happy baby.
I find I always screw things up when I try to listen to what books say my baby should be doing at his age. I'm really not sure why I decided that I didn't want him to be swaddled anymore. What's the problem with swaddling your 6 month old if that's what he likes?
Before I started concentrating much on his "schedule" we were all a lot happier. Now I find I'm obsessing too much about when he's napping and when he's eating and when he's going to bed and when he's waking up... So many places say that a 6 month old should be on a predictable schedule. Well, I don't care what they say anymore. Noah has a routine, but I'm sick of worrying about how he doesn't fit into some 6-month-old-baby mold. I'm sick of comparing him to the baby across the road, who is just 3 weeks older and used to be JUST like him in every way, but now eats every 3-3.5 hours, stays awake for 3 hours at a time, always puts herself to sleep, has stopped crying hysterically when she's put in her crib awake, and has just 2 long naps everyday instead of 4 short ones. Obviously Noah is not Aubrey, and I should stop wishing he would be.
I was very happy to find a baby sleep site that talked about many 6 month old babies napping just like Noah does, and that's it's perfectly normal. I felt reassured that as long as something is working for us - rocking him to sleep, nursing him to sleep, etc. - then it's not a problem. It's only when it becomes something we/I can no longer handle that we need to change it. Nursing Noah to sleep at night is perfectly fine for him. He started sleeping 8-10 hours straight every night on his own when I was still nursing him to sleep, and nursing him when we woke up at night, so obviously it wasn't creating an issue for us. Noah also naps the exact same amount of time whether he puts himself to sleep at naptime or whether Justin or I rock him to sleep. So it's not like I've created a monster in that area.
I'm guessing I'll know when he's ready to transition to 3 naps a day instead of 4. He'll probably start not falling asleep for naps as early as he usually does and still being happy during that time period. We'll see. I'm not going to force it.
Anyway, with the minor exception of waking up and crying for 30 seconds at 10pm (and falling right back to sleep) he slept from 8:15 until 5:30. I changed his bum, re-swaddled him, nursed him for 10 minutes, and he felt right back asleep. I heard him talking to himself around 6:30, but because he was swaddled he couldn't roll over, so he fell back asleep. He then started fussing at 7:45 so I sent Justin to go get him.
It was a normal night again! I am so happy I made the decision to swaddle him again. He clearly still needs it.
Just as he clearly still needs his 4 crap naps everyday. I was trying to transition down to 3 naps, hoping he would have at least one good nap each day that would help this. He only occasionally did that though. So he always had a really early bedtime, which combined with no swaddling led to a really early wake up time, and a less happy baby.
I find I always screw things up when I try to listen to what books say my baby should be doing at his age. I'm really not sure why I decided that I didn't want him to be swaddled anymore. What's the problem with swaddling your 6 month old if that's what he likes?
Before I started concentrating much on his "schedule" we were all a lot happier. Now I find I'm obsessing too much about when he's napping and when he's eating and when he's going to bed and when he's waking up... So many places say that a 6 month old should be on a predictable schedule. Well, I don't care what they say anymore. Noah has a routine, but I'm sick of worrying about how he doesn't fit into some 6-month-old-baby mold. I'm sick of comparing him to the baby across the road, who is just 3 weeks older and used to be JUST like him in every way, but now eats every 3-3.5 hours, stays awake for 3 hours at a time, always puts herself to sleep, has stopped crying hysterically when she's put in her crib awake, and has just 2 long naps everyday instead of 4 short ones. Obviously Noah is not Aubrey, and I should stop wishing he would be.
I was very happy to find a baby sleep site that talked about many 6 month old babies napping just like Noah does, and that's it's perfectly normal. I felt reassured that as long as something is working for us - rocking him to sleep, nursing him to sleep, etc. - then it's not a problem. It's only when it becomes something we/I can no longer handle that we need to change it. Nursing Noah to sleep at night is perfectly fine for him. He started sleeping 8-10 hours straight every night on his own when I was still nursing him to sleep, and nursing him when we woke up at night, so obviously it wasn't creating an issue for us. Noah also naps the exact same amount of time whether he puts himself to sleep at naptime or whether Justin or I rock him to sleep. So it's not like I've created a monster in that area.
I'm guessing I'll know when he's ready to transition to 3 naps a day instead of 4. He'll probably start not falling asleep for naps as early as he usually does and still being happy during that time period. We'll see. I'm not going to force it.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Operation No-Swaddle... Semi-Fail
(Noah is 6 months old)
While I previously thought that we were completely done with swaddling, I have since changed my mind. These crazy nights of waking up over and over are hard on me, but they're also hard on Noah. He may have done well being unswaddled the first couple of nights, but for over a week now he's been sleeping like crap.
Last night he finally was asleep by 8:15 (bedtime started at 6:15, he should have been completely down for the night by 7). He woke up crying several times between that time and about 3:45. At 3:45 I decided to change his bum, swaddle him, and nurse him. I wasn't sure if he would fight the swaddling, since he hasn't been swaddled in several weeks. But he just laid there with limp arms and didn't squirm at all.
After I put him down he burst into wails about 10 minutes later. I went into his room to make sure he hadn't magically rolled over while he was swaddled. He hadn't, so I didn't do anything. He only cried for about a minute. I went back to bed. 5 minutes later he cried again for about 30 seconds. Then he was peaceful until 7:30am!!!!! That's almost 2 hours later than he has been sleeping!
He was awake for a bit before 7:30, but he must have felt rested because he was just lying there in his green swaddler looking like a little bean pod, staring at the ceiling. That's what he used to do almost every morning. Lie there looking around his room with his arms pinned to his sides... so cute.
I'm just going to go back to swaddling him all night again. He obviously can't handle the freedom. I'm going to leave him unswaddled for his naps, though. I don't want to have to actually wean him off the swaddle again. We'll just wait until he has a little more control over his body. He does fine for naps now. Well, not fine. He strictly takes crap naps and doesn't get nearly the amount of sleep he's supposed to. But that's a whole other post.
While I previously thought that we were completely done with swaddling, I have since changed my mind. These crazy nights of waking up over and over are hard on me, but they're also hard on Noah. He may have done well being unswaddled the first couple of nights, but for over a week now he's been sleeping like crap.
Last night he finally was asleep by 8:15 (bedtime started at 6:15, he should have been completely down for the night by 7). He woke up crying several times between that time and about 3:45. At 3:45 I decided to change his bum, swaddle him, and nurse him. I wasn't sure if he would fight the swaddling, since he hasn't been swaddled in several weeks. But he just laid there with limp arms and didn't squirm at all.
After I put him down he burst into wails about 10 minutes later. I went into his room to make sure he hadn't magically rolled over while he was swaddled. He hadn't, so I didn't do anything. He only cried for about a minute. I went back to bed. 5 minutes later he cried again for about 30 seconds. Then he was peaceful until 7:30am!!!!! That's almost 2 hours later than he has been sleeping!
He was awake for a bit before 7:30, but he must have felt rested because he was just lying there in his green swaddler looking like a little bean pod, staring at the ceiling. That's what he used to do almost every morning. Lie there looking around his room with his arms pinned to his sides... so cute.
I'm just going to go back to swaddling him all night again. He obviously can't handle the freedom. I'm going to leave him unswaddled for his naps, though. I don't want to have to actually wean him off the swaddle again. We'll just wait until he has a little more control over his body. He does fine for naps now. Well, not fine. He strictly takes crap naps and doesn't get nearly the amount of sleep he's supposed to. But that's a whole other post.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Terrible Bedtime
This was the worst bedtime ever.
Noah woke up when I tried to put him in his crib after I nursed him to sleep. I decided to let him cry, checking on him and kissing him once in awhile. I've said it before, and I'm going to say it again: this does not work with my child. He loses his ever-lovin' mind. He gets absolutely HYSTERICAL.
It wasn't this simple though. After the first half hour I felt terrible, and he was so far gone nothing would help, so I gave in and put him on the boob to stop the crying. It worked. But when I laid him back down again, he woke up and started crying AGAIN.
I already felt guilty that I gave in the first time and all that crying was for nothing, so I decided I wasn't going to give in again. But he was so upset he made himself throw up. Twice. His ears were filled with tears. His voice was raspy from screaming his throat raw. If he had the motor control he would have thrown himself around the crib. He was desperately reaching for me.
I tried the pick up put down thing. It didn't work. He would calm when I would pick him up, but as soon as he realized I still wanted him to sleep, he would lose it again.
When I couldn't take it anymore I walked out of his bedroom with him up on my shoulder, intending to probably nurse him again. But when I walked out of his room he calmed down. When I walked back in he freaked out. When I walked back out he calmed down.
My poor little munchkin is afraid of his room :(
I got Justin to set up the bassinet part of the pack and play, thinking we might have to have him sleep in our room. But Noah fell asleep on my shoulder. That's only the second time he's done that since he was 2 months old, and the other time he was up crying from teething. I can't even burp him at night after I feed him because putting him in that position wakes him up. That's how tired and desperate he was for me. That he would fall asleep completely upright with his head at this crazy angle.
So then I got Justin to turn down the fan in Noah's room. He always has a fan on the highest setting as white noise because everything we do in our house is very loud in his bedroom. So we turned it down to the quietest setting. I got Noah into his crib. He was as limp as a wet spaghetti noodle. He is NEVER like that when I put him in his crib. He always squirms and tenses, even when he's asleep.
He's in his crib for now, but I have a feeling we're in for a rough night. I'm afraid that when he wakes up and finds himself in his crib, all the horrible memories are going to come rushing back to him and he'll start screaming hysterically again. So I have the pack and play beside my bed in case that happens. He can come sleep in our room.
I feel so guilty for putting him through this. It was all for nothing. I just can't let my child cry. Not even if I'm sitting beside him. If I know there's something I can do to stop the crying, I have to do it. It goes against all my instincts not to.
It's very true what they say - that you shouldn't try any parenting tactics that you're not comfortable with, because they will always fail. You just can't follow through with something you're not comfortable with.
That has proved true time and time again in this household.
Noah woke up when I tried to put him in his crib after I nursed him to sleep. I decided to let him cry, checking on him and kissing him once in awhile. I've said it before, and I'm going to say it again: this does not work with my child. He loses his ever-lovin' mind. He gets absolutely HYSTERICAL.
It wasn't this simple though. After the first half hour I felt terrible, and he was so far gone nothing would help, so I gave in and put him on the boob to stop the crying. It worked. But when I laid him back down again, he woke up and started crying AGAIN.
I already felt guilty that I gave in the first time and all that crying was for nothing, so I decided I wasn't going to give in again. But he was so upset he made himself throw up. Twice. His ears were filled with tears. His voice was raspy from screaming his throat raw. If he had the motor control he would have thrown himself around the crib. He was desperately reaching for me.
I tried the pick up put down thing. It didn't work. He would calm when I would pick him up, but as soon as he realized I still wanted him to sleep, he would lose it again.
When I couldn't take it anymore I walked out of his bedroom with him up on my shoulder, intending to probably nurse him again. But when I walked out of his room he calmed down. When I walked back in he freaked out. When I walked back out he calmed down.
My poor little munchkin is afraid of his room :(
I got Justin to set up the bassinet part of the pack and play, thinking we might have to have him sleep in our room. But Noah fell asleep on my shoulder. That's only the second time he's done that since he was 2 months old, and the other time he was up crying from teething. I can't even burp him at night after I feed him because putting him in that position wakes him up. That's how tired and desperate he was for me. That he would fall asleep completely upright with his head at this crazy angle.
So then I got Justin to turn down the fan in Noah's room. He always has a fan on the highest setting as white noise because everything we do in our house is very loud in his bedroom. So we turned it down to the quietest setting. I got Noah into his crib. He was as limp as a wet spaghetti noodle. He is NEVER like that when I put him in his crib. He always squirms and tenses, even when he's asleep.
He's in his crib for now, but I have a feeling we're in for a rough night. I'm afraid that when he wakes up and finds himself in his crib, all the horrible memories are going to come rushing back to him and he'll start screaming hysterically again. So I have the pack and play beside my bed in case that happens. He can come sleep in our room.
I feel so guilty for putting him through this. It was all for nothing. I just can't let my child cry. Not even if I'm sitting beside him. If I know there's something I can do to stop the crying, I have to do it. It goes against all my instincts not to.
It's very true what they say - that you shouldn't try any parenting tactics that you're not comfortable with, because they will always fail. You just can't follow through with something you're not comfortable with.
That has proved true time and time again in this household.
The Stage Continues...
I wrote my last post about Noah's crappy sleeping on Monday. It is now Thursday and we are still struggling. Except it can't all be blamed on rolling over in his sleep. That's a large part of it, but he is also crying for no reason at all. Last night he went to bed fine, but woke up two hours later at 9:00 and cried off and on until midnight when I finally nursed him just to finally get some sleep for myself. Luckily he slept until 5:45, but then he was up crying again (like everyday these days). Again I nursed him, and miraculously he went back to sleep until 7. Not a good night.
I think the bad nights might be partially due to Noah being overtired. We are at an awkward stage. He needs more sleep than he's getting, but I can't seem to make him get it. He hardly ever naps for any longer than 40 minutes at a time, but his awake times at this age are too long for him to fit in four 30-40 minute naps during the day and still go to bed on time. And now his internal alarm clock is waking him up at 5:45 every morning (don't get me started on how terrified I am of the time change looming on the horizon). So getting to bed on time is even more important than it ever was, since no matter what time he goes to bed he will still get up for the day at 5:45. I really think all his wailing last night was just from him being overtired.
On the bright side, today and yesterday he put himself to sleep for 5 out of 6 of his naps. There was no fussing at all for 3 of them, and just a tiny tiny bit for the first two. The 6th nap (the one I just put him down for) was a complete disaster. He was SCREAMING for some reason. No idea why. After half an hour I finally nursed him again, and he calmed down. So maybe he was hungry. I didn't think he should be, but you never know. Sometimes I'm hungry when I don't think I should be.
Another bright side: Noah is rolling from front to back much more frequently than he ever did before. He does it several times a day. Not nearly as much - or with as much skill - as rolling from back to front, but he's getting better. And man he can creep FAST and FAR along the ground. I'm really hoping that a big part of his sleep troubles are due to disturbances from milestones.
I think the bad nights might be partially due to Noah being overtired. We are at an awkward stage. He needs more sleep than he's getting, but I can't seem to make him get it. He hardly ever naps for any longer than 40 minutes at a time, but his awake times at this age are too long for him to fit in four 30-40 minute naps during the day and still go to bed on time. And now his internal alarm clock is waking him up at 5:45 every morning (don't get me started on how terrified I am of the time change looming on the horizon). So getting to bed on time is even more important than it ever was, since no matter what time he goes to bed he will still get up for the day at 5:45. I really think all his wailing last night was just from him being overtired.
On the bright side, today and yesterday he put himself to sleep for 5 out of 6 of his naps. There was no fussing at all for 3 of them, and just a tiny tiny bit for the first two. The 6th nap (the one I just put him down for) was a complete disaster. He was SCREAMING for some reason. No idea why. After half an hour I finally nursed him again, and he calmed down. So maybe he was hungry. I didn't think he should be, but you never know. Sometimes I'm hungry when I don't think I should be.
Another bright side: Noah is rolling from front to back much more frequently than he ever did before. He does it several times a day. Not nearly as much - or with as much skill - as rolling from back to front, but he's getting better. And man he can creep FAST and FAR along the ground. I'm really hoping that a big part of his sleep troubles are due to disturbances from milestones.
Monday, September 13, 2010
New Stage = Not Fun
I am beginning to wonder why I ever decided to stop swaddling. It may be making a comeback. Last night was brutal.
In my previous post I mentioned how the other night Noah migrated from being on his back in the middle of his crib to being on his stomach, sideways, at the top of his crib. Well, last night was a not-so-joyous sequel to that story.
Noah was in bed around 7:40. At 10:30 he woke me up crying and I had to go put a soother in his mouth. Then starting at 12:15 he was crying again, wide awake in his crib from rolling himself over onto his tummy. This means he was awake from about 12:00 onward, because he usually doesn't cry immediately when he ends up on his stomach. He can tolerate it for awhile.
For over an hour and a half I had to keep going in there, flip him over, and put a soother in his mouth. I wanted him to fall back asleep on his own. He didn't. At 1:50 I finally decided he'd been awake long enough and was not going to fall back asleep on his own, so I changed his bum and nursed him to sleep. No, he was not hungry, but he was not going to go back to sleep any other way.
Because he'd only had 4 1/2 hours of sleep up until this point, I figured he'd sleep at least until 6:30 when Justin's alarm goes off. But no. He woke me up crying again at 5:50. So I kept going in there and flipping him over, but he wouldn't stop going back onto his stomach and crying.
Finally at 6:45 I rocked him back to sleep. I thought he'd sleep for at least his 30 to 40 minutes. He woke up again at 7:05.
BRUTAL.
Tonight after I put him to bed I stayed and watched. He woke up a little bit and rolled onto his side, stroking his puppy's face (the puppy is his bedtime comfort object). He then fell asleep again, sucking his soother, and lying on his right side. As soon as he squirms he's totally going to end up on his tummy again and I almost guarantee we're going to be doing this whole song and dance again tonight.
If we do have the "pleasure" of a repeat performance, I'm ditching the sleep sack and swaddling up those legs SO TIGHT he won't be able to move them. And he'll stay that way until he learns to control rolling from his stomach to his back, so I don't have to do it for him.
Oh, I should mention, Daddy conveniently slept through 2 hours of intermittent crying and me getting out of bed ninety times. I don't know how he does that.
In my previous post I mentioned how the other night Noah migrated from being on his back in the middle of his crib to being on his stomach, sideways, at the top of his crib. Well, last night was a not-so-joyous sequel to that story.
Noah was in bed around 7:40. At 10:30 he woke me up crying and I had to go put a soother in his mouth. Then starting at 12:15 he was crying again, wide awake in his crib from rolling himself over onto his tummy. This means he was awake from about 12:00 onward, because he usually doesn't cry immediately when he ends up on his stomach. He can tolerate it for awhile.
For over an hour and a half I had to keep going in there, flip him over, and put a soother in his mouth. I wanted him to fall back asleep on his own. He didn't. At 1:50 I finally decided he'd been awake long enough and was not going to fall back asleep on his own, so I changed his bum and nursed him to sleep. No, he was not hungry, but he was not going to go back to sleep any other way.
Because he'd only had 4 1/2 hours of sleep up until this point, I figured he'd sleep at least until 6:30 when Justin's alarm goes off. But no. He woke me up crying again at 5:50. So I kept going in there and flipping him over, but he wouldn't stop going back onto his stomach and crying.
Finally at 6:45 I rocked him back to sleep. I thought he'd sleep for at least his 30 to 40 minutes. He woke up again at 7:05.
BRUTAL.
Tonight after I put him to bed I stayed and watched. He woke up a little bit and rolled onto his side, stroking his puppy's face (the puppy is his bedtime comfort object). He then fell asleep again, sucking his soother, and lying on his right side. As soon as he squirms he's totally going to end up on his tummy again and I almost guarantee we're going to be doing this whole song and dance again tonight.
If we do have the "pleasure" of a repeat performance, I'm ditching the sleep sack and swaddling up those legs SO TIGHT he won't be able to move them. And he'll stay that way until he learns to control rolling from his stomach to his back, so I don't have to do it for him.
Oh, I should mention, Daddy conveniently slept through 2 hours of intermittent crying and me getting out of bed ninety times. I don't know how he does that.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
5 Months 3 Weeks
Noah is 5 months 3 weeks old
-Noah is a totally fantastic sitter! He can sit independently for several minutes at a time, self-correct his movements, and not even have to prop himself with his arms the whole time!
-A couple of days ago Noah discovered he can make the "M" sound. So he keeps doing it. His little mouth looks sooo cute when he does it.
-Today Noah said "Mum" 3 times! Obviously I realize he was not calling me "Mum," but he still said it! Justin agreed.
-I guess I should have mentioned that Operation No-Swaddle is a success! After it worked when I unswaddled his arms that first night I went out and bought sleep sacks. That is now what he wears for all his naps and night time sleeps. This is great... except that he rolls over in his sleep, as I mentioned in the previous bullet.
-I believe I have discovered that Noah's current optimal awake time after a 30-40 minute nap is an hour and 45 minutes. If I start putting him down for his next nap at that time I get pretty much no protest and he closes his eyes and falls asleep quickly. I realize that at about 6 months he should be having longer awake periods, and he can go longer. But when he does, it's harder to get him to sleep, and then he still doesn't sleep any longer than 30 or 40 minutes. So in the past couple of days I've stopped bothering to aim for that. If I do an hour and 45 minutes for awake time then he gets 4 short naps in a day, which gives him between 2 and 2.5 hours of naps total. He seems to be a little behind the 8 ball in consolidating nap times, and he's been shortening his nighttime sleeping from 12-13 hours to about 11 hours. I would rather him get as much sleep as he can so he's not chronically overtired. I'm a stay-at-home mom; I can follow his lead on this.
-I had the worst parenting experience of my life last week. Noah was in the jolly jumper, killing the last 15 minutes before naptime. I looked over and saw poop leaking down his right leg. Without thinking about how I should prepare things to get him cleaned up, I just took him out of the jolly jumper, which of course had poop all over it. He was wearing a long sleeved, long panted (not a word, I know), hooded jumper that needed to be pulled over his head to get on and off (no buttons up the front). I will skip a lot of the details, but by the time I got it off of him there was poop all over his arms and neck and head. Keep in mind it's naptime, so he's tired. I put him in the big bathtub to clean him off, and he immediately screamed a thousand times harder than he's ever screamed before. I panicked, because he was COVERED in poop and I obviously had to clean him, but he had never been so upset. I stripped off all my clothes and picked up my poop-covered baby. I couldn't just let him lie there and scream! I was covered in poop, Noah was covered in poop... I turned on the shower and we stood under it and I cuddled and talked to Noah. He calmed down. There was still some more crying later as I laid him down in the bath water so I could actually soap him up, but once he was dry with a soother in his mouth he was fine. I felt so bad I let him nurse to sleep for his nap. Of course, he forgot all about it by the time he woke up, but I will never forget!!
-Noah is a totally fantastic sitter! He can sit independently for several minutes at a time, self-correct his movements, and not even have to prop himself with his arms the whole time!
-A couple of days ago Noah discovered he can make the "M" sound. So he keeps doing it. His little mouth looks sooo cute when he does it.
-Today Noah said "Mum" 3 times! Obviously I realize he was not calling me "Mum," but he still said it! Justin agreed.
Noah and Mama:
-I guess I should have mentioned that Operation No-Swaddle is a success! After it worked when I unswaddled his arms that first night I went out and bought sleep sacks. That is now what he wears for all his naps and night time sleeps. This is great... except that he rolls over in his sleep, as I mentioned in the previous bullet.
-I believe I have discovered that Noah's current optimal awake time after a 30-40 minute nap is an hour and 45 minutes. If I start putting him down for his next nap at that time I get pretty much no protest and he closes his eyes and falls asleep quickly. I realize that at about 6 months he should be having longer awake periods, and he can go longer. But when he does, it's harder to get him to sleep, and then he still doesn't sleep any longer than 30 or 40 minutes. So in the past couple of days I've stopped bothering to aim for that. If I do an hour and 45 minutes for awake time then he gets 4 short naps in a day, which gives him between 2 and 2.5 hours of naps total. He seems to be a little behind the 8 ball in consolidating nap times, and he's been shortening his nighttime sleeping from 12-13 hours to about 11 hours. I would rather him get as much sleep as he can so he's not chronically overtired. I'm a stay-at-home mom; I can follow his lead on this.
-I had the worst parenting experience of my life last week. Noah was in the jolly jumper, killing the last 15 minutes before naptime. I looked over and saw poop leaking down his right leg. Without thinking about how I should prepare things to get him cleaned up, I just took him out of the jolly jumper, which of course had poop all over it. He was wearing a long sleeved, long panted (not a word, I know), hooded jumper that needed to be pulled over his head to get on and off (no buttons up the front). I will skip a lot of the details, but by the time I got it off of him there was poop all over his arms and neck and head. Keep in mind it's naptime, so he's tired. I put him in the big bathtub to clean him off, and he immediately screamed a thousand times harder than he's ever screamed before. I panicked, because he was COVERED in poop and I obviously had to clean him, but he had never been so upset. I stripped off all my clothes and picked up my poop-covered baby. I couldn't just let him lie there and scream! I was covered in poop, Noah was covered in poop... I turned on the shower and we stood under it and I cuddled and talked to Noah. He calmed down. There was still some more crying later as I laid him down in the bath water so I could actually soap him up, but once he was dry with a soother in his mouth he was fine. I felt so bad I let him nurse to sleep for his nap. Of course, he forgot all about it by the time he woke up, but I will never forget!!
Thursday, September 9, 2010
EARLY Bedtime Baby
I believe I've mentioned that for the past few weeks Noah has been waking up at 6 or 6:30 in the morning - EVERY MORNING - after only 10.5 - 11 hours of sleep. He used to sleep 12-13 hours a night. He is also only having three 30-40 minute naps a day. Occasionally one of those naps is a longer nap, but only about half the time. He used to have four 30-40 minute naps a day.
A baby his age should be getting 14.5 hours of sleep a day. A few months ago he was sleeping so well at night that even though he didn't nap well during the day, he was still getting at least 14.5 hours a day. Now, he's getting about 12, 12.5 hours. It's not enough, but we're in this vicious pattern that I can't get him out of.
As you can imagine, since he's waking up at 6am and napping very little, bedtime has been getting earlier (it was already 7:30). Research - along with my own experience in the past 6 months - has shown that it doesn't matter what time the baby goes to bed, he'll get up at roughly the same time in the morning. Putting baby to bed late doesn't mean he'll get up late.
Last night I started nursing him to sleep at 6:55. Even though he'd been up since about 3:30 I was still worried that he wouldn't go to sleep that early, but he did. He was in bed by 7:25 or something like that.
Then today he woke up from his last nap at 3:25, and it was less than half an hour long. So he only had 3 naps, two were about 40 minutes and the last one was less than 30 minutes. By 5:30 he was EXHAUSTED. I prolonged as much as possible, but by 6:05 I was thinking it was just too mean to keep him awake any longer. Again, I was afraid he wouldn't go to sleep that early, even though he was tired. Because that has happened before. One night he had been awake for 2 1/2 hours, but when I started nursing him to sleep at 6:50 it was like his brain told him it was before 7pm and was too early to go to sleep.
Our bedtime routine is boob, bath, boob, bed. I gave him the first boob at 6:05. He was out of the tub and on the second boob by 6:30. Usually for that last boob of the day he nurses for about half an hour (not actively the whole time, but he suckles while he sleeps) and I have to pop him off to put him to bed. If I pop him off too early (say, after 15 minutes) he wakes up.
Well, tonight after only 10 MINUTES his mouth went completely slack and was just hanging open. I didn't have to break suction or anything. He was in bed by 6:40.
CRAZY.
As much as I love having both the time to myself in the evening and an early bedtime for myself, I feel like it's really weird that he's on this super early to bed, super early to rise schedule.
What's ironic is that it started just before Justin was going to back to work. During the work week Justin gets up at 6:30am. He leaves for work at 7:15-7:30am, and gets home from work at 3pm. He then leaves to go back to coach at 6:45pm and gets home again at 9:10pm.
It's like Noah subconsciously knew this was going to happen and decided that not only does he want to make sure he sees his Daddy in the morning before work, but he also wants to just go to sleep once Daddy leaves at night. No use in staying up if Daddy isn't there.
A baby his age should be getting 14.5 hours of sleep a day. A few months ago he was sleeping so well at night that even though he didn't nap well during the day, he was still getting at least 14.5 hours a day. Now, he's getting about 12, 12.5 hours. It's not enough, but we're in this vicious pattern that I can't get him out of.
As you can imagine, since he's waking up at 6am and napping very little, bedtime has been getting earlier (it was already 7:30). Research - along with my own experience in the past 6 months - has shown that it doesn't matter what time the baby goes to bed, he'll get up at roughly the same time in the morning. Putting baby to bed late doesn't mean he'll get up late.
Last night I started nursing him to sleep at 6:55. Even though he'd been up since about 3:30 I was still worried that he wouldn't go to sleep that early, but he did. He was in bed by 7:25 or something like that.
Then today he woke up from his last nap at 3:25, and it was less than half an hour long. So he only had 3 naps, two were about 40 minutes and the last one was less than 30 minutes. By 5:30 he was EXHAUSTED. I prolonged as much as possible, but by 6:05 I was thinking it was just too mean to keep him awake any longer. Again, I was afraid he wouldn't go to sleep that early, even though he was tired. Because that has happened before. One night he had been awake for 2 1/2 hours, but when I started nursing him to sleep at 6:50 it was like his brain told him it was before 7pm and was too early to go to sleep.
Our bedtime routine is boob, bath, boob, bed. I gave him the first boob at 6:05. He was out of the tub and on the second boob by 6:30. Usually for that last boob of the day he nurses for about half an hour (not actively the whole time, but he suckles while he sleeps) and I have to pop him off to put him to bed. If I pop him off too early (say, after 15 minutes) he wakes up.
Well, tonight after only 10 MINUTES his mouth went completely slack and was just hanging open. I didn't have to break suction or anything. He was in bed by 6:40.
CRAZY.
As much as I love having both the time to myself in the evening and an early bedtime for myself, I feel like it's really weird that he's on this super early to bed, super early to rise schedule.
What's ironic is that it started just before Justin was going to back to work. During the work week Justin gets up at 6:30am. He leaves for work at 7:15-7:30am, and gets home from work at 3pm. He then leaves to go back to coach at 6:45pm and gets home again at 9:10pm.
It's like Noah subconsciously knew this was going to happen and decided that not only does he want to make sure he sees his Daddy in the morning before work, but he also wants to just go to sleep once Daddy leaves at night. No use in staying up if Daddy isn't there.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
(Almost) Wordless Wednesday
Noah at 5 1/2 months:
Sooo big!
See, Dad? I'm a good sitter, right?!
Eating Dino's bum... no big surprise:
Timberrrrrrr!!!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Poor Monkey
Noah has had a really rough couple of days. I don't know what his problem is, but he has been so cranky. I really have no idea what to do to help him. When he was cutting teeth he was really cranky, but I knew he was cutting teeth. And I could help. I could give him teething tablets, tylenol, orajel, things to chew on, and rub his gums. And really, he just wanted cuddles and love. If I did all that he was okay. So for a few days I couldn't do any housework. No big deal.
I'm pretty confident Noah isn't cutting teeth this time. I've felt and looked at his gums, and I see nothing. I can't figure out what's wrong with him, but I feel bad for the poor little monkey.
Today at one point the only thing we could do to make him content was to put him in his swing in front of Sesame Street. As much as I don't love kids watching TV, it was pretty adorable to watch him swinging, sucking on his soother, watching Sesame Street.
He also fell asleep in the car twice today. One of those times it was after about 3 minutes of driving (he had only been awake for an hour and a half) and when we got to my parents' house we were able to take him upstairs in his carseat and put him on the ground in the nursery (yes, my parents have a nursery) and leave him there. He actually had an entire half hour nap like that - NOT in the car. I don't think that has ever happened in his entire life.
The other time he fell asleep he had only been awake for an hour and conked out after 10 minutes of driving. He hasn't fallen asleep on a short car ride (short being less than an hour) in months.
He is so overtired. I don't know what to do about it. For the past couple of weeks he's been waking up for the day at 6:30am (everyday), so then all his naps get moved up because of the earlier start to the day. But he only sleeps 30-40 minutes most of the time, and he won't go to bed before 7pm, so I end up having to give him a fourth nap in the late afternoon, otherwise he's up from like, 2:30 until 7. That's way too long for him. Then that fourth nap goes later than I would like, and bedtime is later because of it. But it doesn't matter how late he's up, he always gets up at 6:30am anyway. So he isn't getting anywhere close to the 14.5 hours of sleep a baby his age is supposed to get.
Maybe that's why he's so cranky. Although, it sounds more like he's complaining because of some sort of pain, rather than tiredness.
I should also mention that the past two days have been horrible, nap-wise. I have had the hardest time getting him to sleep. Twice yesterday I gave up and let him lie on my lap watching TV (I know that sounds terrible, but when your baby is sad and crying and TV makes him stop, you just let him watch TV) and he eventually fell asleep like that. Actually, one of the times he was just watching TV and looked sleepy so I leaned over and kissed his forehead and he immediately closed his eyes, gave a few little sighs, and fell asleep. It was instantaneous. Somehow I managed to slide my hands under his head and bum and carry him awkwardly with his arms dangling to his crib, and lay him down in it without him waking up. It was so weird. Like he was a newborn again.
I hope he feels better tomorrow.
I'm pretty confident Noah isn't cutting teeth this time. I've felt and looked at his gums, and I see nothing. I can't figure out what's wrong with him, but I feel bad for the poor little monkey.
Today at one point the only thing we could do to make him content was to put him in his swing in front of Sesame Street. As much as I don't love kids watching TV, it was pretty adorable to watch him swinging, sucking on his soother, watching Sesame Street.
He also fell asleep in the car twice today. One of those times it was after about 3 minutes of driving (he had only been awake for an hour and a half) and when we got to my parents' house we were able to take him upstairs in his carseat and put him on the ground in the nursery (yes, my parents have a nursery) and leave him there. He actually had an entire half hour nap like that - NOT in the car. I don't think that has ever happened in his entire life.
The other time he fell asleep he had only been awake for an hour and conked out after 10 minutes of driving. He hasn't fallen asleep on a short car ride (short being less than an hour) in months.
He is so overtired. I don't know what to do about it. For the past couple of weeks he's been waking up for the day at 6:30am (everyday), so then all his naps get moved up because of the earlier start to the day. But he only sleeps 30-40 minutes most of the time, and he won't go to bed before 7pm, so I end up having to give him a fourth nap in the late afternoon, otherwise he's up from like, 2:30 until 7. That's way too long for him. Then that fourth nap goes later than I would like, and bedtime is later because of it. But it doesn't matter how late he's up, he always gets up at 6:30am anyway. So he isn't getting anywhere close to the 14.5 hours of sleep a baby his age is supposed to get.
Maybe that's why he's so cranky. Although, it sounds more like he's complaining because of some sort of pain, rather than tiredness.
I should also mention that the past two days have been horrible, nap-wise. I have had the hardest time getting him to sleep. Twice yesterday I gave up and let him lie on my lap watching TV (I know that sounds terrible, but when your baby is sad and crying and TV makes him stop, you just let him watch TV) and he eventually fell asleep like that. Actually, one of the times he was just watching TV and looked sleepy so I leaned over and kissed his forehead and he immediately closed his eyes, gave a few little sighs, and fell asleep. It was instantaneous. Somehow I managed to slide my hands under his head and bum and carry him awkwardly with his arms dangling to his crib, and lay him down in it without him waking up. It was so weird. Like he was a newborn again.
I hope he feels better tomorrow.
Jumperoo!!
Because Noah grew out of his exersaucer, I decided to take the plunge and spend $150 on a jumperoo:
Jumperoos are made for tall babies. If you're pregnant and you and your husband are blessed/cursed with height (I'm almost 5'10", my husband is 6'5") don't even bother with an exersaucer. Get a jumperoo. They're more fun anyway, and when your baby is too short for it you can just put books or a pillow under his feet until he can touch the ground.
Noah only ever tolerated his exersaucer, and we had a sweet, pimped out, top-of-the-line exersaucer. He'd complain pretty much the entire time he was in it. Total waste of money.
The only problem is that the jumping is different than the kind he does in the jolly jumper:
Justin and I are not happy with this development. Guess we're going to be using the jumperoo a little less and the jolly jumper a little more.
Clearly he's happy with my decision:)
Can you see his little teeth??:
Jumperoos are made for tall babies. If you're pregnant and you and your husband are blessed/cursed with height (I'm almost 5'10", my husband is 6'5") don't even bother with an exersaucer. Get a jumperoo. They're more fun anyway, and when your baby is too short for it you can just put books or a pillow under his feet until he can touch the ground.
Noah only ever tolerated his exersaucer, and we had a sweet, pimped out, top-of-the-line exersaucer. He'd complain pretty much the entire time he was in it. Total waste of money.
The only problem is that the jumping is different than the kind he does in the jolly jumper:
Justin and I are not happy with this development. Guess we're going to be using the jumperoo a little less and the jolly jumper a little more.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Operation No-Swaddle, Night 1
I think Night 1 of Operation No-Swaddle was a success. I decided to just go for broke and release BOTH arms at once. I just wrapped Noah up around the chest, and he was fine. He went to bed late - in his crib by 8:30 - because of his late nap. He got up to eat at 4, and then up for the day at 6:30. I'm not a fan of the fact that "night time" was only 10 hours long last night, but that seems to be the way he sleeps now, swaddled or not. I actually think he would have eaten at 2:45 instead of 4:00 if he was swaddled, because I heard him smacking away on his hands at that time. Hopefully he wasn't awake in his crib playing from 2:45 until 4!!
The only problem I have now is that his hands were like blocks of ice when I fed him at 4am. His body was okay because it had been wrapped in a blanket, but I'm assuming his arms were chilly as well. Our house is 70 degrees at night, which is still too warm for me (I'm in shorts and a t-shirt with just a light sheet on me), but it was way too cold for Noah's hands.
For the fall and winter I'm going to get him fleece sleepers, and maybe find some long sleeved onesies to put underneath so keep his arms warm. I also bought fleece sleep sacks that I'm going to try out soon instead of the blanket wrapped around his chest. But none of this is going to affect his poor little cold hands. And there's no way I'm keeping my house at 70 degrees all winter long!
Any tips for the cold hands??
The only problem I have now is that his hands were like blocks of ice when I fed him at 4am. His body was okay because it had been wrapped in a blanket, but I'm assuming his arms were chilly as well. Our house is 70 degrees at night, which is still too warm for me (I'm in shorts and a t-shirt with just a light sheet on me), but it was way too cold for Noah's hands.
For the fall and winter I'm going to get him fleece sleepers, and maybe find some long sleeved onesies to put underneath so keep his arms warm. I also bought fleece sleep sacks that I'm going to try out soon instead of the blanket wrapped around his chest. But none of this is going to affect his poor little cold hands. And there's no way I'm keeping my house at 70 degrees all winter long!
Any tips for the cold hands??
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Operation No-Swaddle, Day 8
I would say Day 8 of Operation No-Swaddle was fairly successful again. Noah went down so easily for all of his naps. His first three naps were 40 minutes, 40 minutes, and 30 minutes. None of the naps had him making so much as a peep before going to sleep. I just swaddled him around the chest, put his soother in, he cuddled his puppy head blanket, and I gently rocked him to sleep. He fell asleep within a couple of minutes each time.
He wasn't going to have a fourth nap, but my inlaws were over and because he was kind of tired they were making him cry. So I decided to put him down for another nap. We followed the same routine as the three naps before, but after I laid him down he woke up. I just kind of his in his room and watched him as he fell back asleep on his own. I had to go replace his soother twice after he pulled it out, but other than that he fell asleep on his own, no fussing. Then, of course, he slept an hour and 20 minutes. So he didn't wake up until 6pm. This has thrown us way off schedule, but whatever.
I was hoping for only 3 naps today, but he woke up for the day at 6:30am (after going to bed at 7:45 and waking to eat at 2:15am... not a stellar night). This makes it difficult to only have 3 naps since he was awake earlier than normal but would still be going to sleep no earlier than 7pm (he won't go to bed before then), so I kept him up for 2 1/2 hours between each nap. I was really hoping one of them would be a long one, and if it had been we would have been able to stick with only 3 naps. Of course he decided to catnap for his first three naps and have a long one for his fourth nap. A nap that he probably wouldn't have had if he was just at home with mommy and daddy.
I think tonight we are going to start swaddle weaning. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to do one arm out or two arms out, but I think tonight might be the night to start.
He wasn't going to have a fourth nap, but my inlaws were over and because he was kind of tired they were making him cry. So I decided to put him down for another nap. We followed the same routine as the three naps before, but after I laid him down he woke up. I just kind of his in his room and watched him as he fell back asleep on his own. I had to go replace his soother twice after he pulled it out, but other than that he fell asleep on his own, no fussing. Then, of course, he slept an hour and 20 minutes. So he didn't wake up until 6pm. This has thrown us way off schedule, but whatever.
I was hoping for only 3 naps today, but he woke up for the day at 6:30am (after going to bed at 7:45 and waking to eat at 2:15am... not a stellar night). This makes it difficult to only have 3 naps since he was awake earlier than normal but would still be going to sleep no earlier than 7pm (he won't go to bed before then), so I kept him up for 2 1/2 hours between each nap. I was really hoping one of them would be a long one, and if it had been we would have been able to stick with only 3 naps. Of course he decided to catnap for his first three naps and have a long one for his fourth nap. A nap that he probably wouldn't have had if he was just at home with mommy and daddy.
I think tonight we are going to start swaddle weaning. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to do one arm out or two arms out, but I think tonight might be the night to start.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Operation No-Swaddle, Day 7
Day 7 of Operation No-Swaddle was our best day yet! We moved onto Phase 2 of our plan: swaddle around the chest with both arms free. I was a little nervous going into Phase 2, but Noah was a rockstar.
Nap #1 - Like the past few days there was a lot of fussing and back arching. I put him down to fuss it out for a couple of minutes. I can't remember if I did this once or twice, but while I was out of the room he hugged his puppy/blanket, sucked on his soother, and went to sleep. This nap lasted an hour and 20 minutes. Amazing.
Nap #2 - Was a repeat of nap #1, except that it only lasted for 40 minutes. Still, he put himself to sleep again. Amazing.
Nap #3 - I gave him the opportunity to put himself to sleep by putting him down when he was drowsy but calm. He didn't like this at all and cried quite a bit. I picked him back up and rocked him to sleep as he hugged his puppy/blanket and sucked his soother. I laid him down in his crib with no problems (he didn't squirm himself awake). This nap lasted an hour and 20 minutes - AGAIN!!
We had 2 long naps today! We haven't had that in AGES! And in the 6 days of swaddle weaning prior to today, we had only had 1 long nap (in about 20 naps, total).
I'd say this phase of the plan was a complete success. He's still fully swaddled at nighttime, though. I haven't had the guts to try an arm out. I really should. Too late for tonight, though. He's already in bed.
Nap #1 - Like the past few days there was a lot of fussing and back arching. I put him down to fuss it out for a couple of minutes. I can't remember if I did this once or twice, but while I was out of the room he hugged his puppy/blanket, sucked on his soother, and went to sleep. This nap lasted an hour and 20 minutes. Amazing.
Nap #2 - Was a repeat of nap #1, except that it only lasted for 40 minutes. Still, he put himself to sleep again. Amazing.
Nap #3 - I gave him the opportunity to put himself to sleep by putting him down when he was drowsy but calm. He didn't like this at all and cried quite a bit. I picked him back up and rocked him to sleep as he hugged his puppy/blanket and sucked his soother. I laid him down in his crib with no problems (he didn't squirm himself awake). This nap lasted an hour and 20 minutes - AGAIN!!
We had 2 long naps today! We haven't had that in AGES! And in the 6 days of swaddle weaning prior to today, we had only had 1 long nap (in about 20 naps, total).
I'd say this phase of the plan was a complete success. He's still fully swaddled at nighttime, though. I haven't had the guts to try an arm out. I really should. Too late for tonight, though. He's already in bed.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
5 1/2 Month Pictures
Eating his toes... something he does every chance he gets:
In the exersaucer he's too tall for:
He needs to have something in his mouth at all times:
Little cutie:)
Operation No Swaddle, Day 6
Day 6 of Operation No-Swaddle was completely different from the previous 5 days. There were some similarities, but overall it was not your average swaddle Noah with left arm out, fuss a little bit but quickly soothe, rock or bounce to sleep in 5 minutes or less, sleep for 30-40 minutes 3 or 4 times during the day kind of day (follow that?)
Nap #1 - Noah cries and squirms a lot. I put him down in his crib for a few minutes. Crying escalates. I go back in and try to soothe him in his crib. He stops screaming, but it's clear this isn't going to work. I pick him up and try bouncing him, which is usually what he likes best. He doesn't like it this time. I sit down in the rocker (usually something I can't do until he's almost asleep anyway) and he immediately calms down. I cuddle his face close to my face, kissing his cheeks. He falls asleep in a couple of minutes and goes down with no issues. This nap lasts 40 minutes
Nap #2a- Again, Noah resists going to sleep in a very dramatic way. Again, I lay him down in his crib so he will appreciate me more when I get back. He doesn't. The bouncing/rocking don't work and he actually starts wailing while I try. I lay him down again and try kissing his cheeks, humming Take Me Out to the Ball Game (yes, this still generally works), and holding his arm and legs down as he squirms. It sounds mean, but it's actually not; I'm doing him a favour. This doesn't work. I've been offering him his puppy/blanket as a comfort object for the past few days, but it hasn't done anything so far. Of course I continue to offer it because I want him to grow attached to it and associate it with sleep. I lay his puppy/blanket beside him in his free left arm, like I've tried doing every nap for the past 3 days or so. He's still crying and I'm getting frustrated, so I take a step back, rest my arms on the side of the crib, and lay my head on my arms. Noah's still whimpering, but he starts to fondle the puppy/blanket. Then he turns his head to the right, closes his eyes, sucks on his soother, and falls asleep. I stare at him in disbelief. This can't be my child. He's going to start crying again. He doesn't. I leave the room, and he naps for 45 minutes.
Nap #2b - Noah wakes up from his second nap quite upset. I try leaving him, but thaty doesn't work. I try to soothe him back to sleep in a variety of ways, both lying in his crib and in my arms, but the crying only increases. I try putting him upright in my arms (even though he seemed like he still needed to be asleep), but this doesn't work. So I take him to my bed and put him on the boob. This is what he wanted, so he falls asleep for the next 50 minutes. When he wakes up, he's happy.
Nap #3 - I'm expecting the same battle we've had with every nap for the past 2 days. I even say to him "It's night-night time, ready to start crying your head off??" as I'm swaddling him (I say "It's night-night time" several times before each nap). We walk into the room and I sit down in the rocker and start rocking him. He slowly closes his eyes. He's asleep within 4 minutes of me swaddling him, and he doesn't make a single peep. Not one fuss. That nap was 40 minutes.
I didn't have the patience today to try swaddling with both arms out. Maybe tomorrow.
Nap #1 - Noah cries and squirms a lot. I put him down in his crib for a few minutes. Crying escalates. I go back in and try to soothe him in his crib. He stops screaming, but it's clear this isn't going to work. I pick him up and try bouncing him, which is usually what he likes best. He doesn't like it this time. I sit down in the rocker (usually something I can't do until he's almost asleep anyway) and he immediately calms down. I cuddle his face close to my face, kissing his cheeks. He falls asleep in a couple of minutes and goes down with no issues. This nap lasts 40 minutes
Nap #2a- Again, Noah resists going to sleep in a very dramatic way. Again, I lay him down in his crib so he will appreciate me more when I get back. He doesn't. The bouncing/rocking don't work and he actually starts wailing while I try. I lay him down again and try kissing his cheeks, humming Take Me Out to the Ball Game (yes, this still generally works), and holding his arm and legs down as he squirms. It sounds mean, but it's actually not; I'm doing him a favour. This doesn't work. I've been offering him his puppy/blanket as a comfort object for the past few days, but it hasn't done anything so far. Of course I continue to offer it because I want him to grow attached to it and associate it with sleep. I lay his puppy/blanket beside him in his free left arm, like I've tried doing every nap for the past 3 days or so. He's still crying and I'm getting frustrated, so I take a step back, rest my arms on the side of the crib, and lay my head on my arms. Noah's still whimpering, but he starts to fondle the puppy/blanket. Then he turns his head to the right, closes his eyes, sucks on his soother, and falls asleep. I stare at him in disbelief. This can't be my child. He's going to start crying again. He doesn't. I leave the room, and he naps for 45 minutes.
Nap #2b - Noah wakes up from his second nap quite upset. I try leaving him, but thaty doesn't work. I try to soothe him back to sleep in a variety of ways, both lying in his crib and in my arms, but the crying only increases. I try putting him upright in my arms (even though he seemed like he still needed to be asleep), but this doesn't work. So I take him to my bed and put him on the boob. This is what he wanted, so he falls asleep for the next 50 minutes. When he wakes up, he's happy.
Nap #3 - I'm expecting the same battle we've had with every nap for the past 2 days. I even say to him "It's night-night time, ready to start crying your head off??" as I'm swaddling him (I say "It's night-night time" several times before each nap). We walk into the room and I sit down in the rocker and start rocking him. He slowly closes his eyes. He's asleep within 4 minutes of me swaddling him, and he doesn't make a single peep. Not one fuss. That nap was 40 minutes.
I didn't have the patience today to try swaddling with both arms out. Maybe tomorrow.
Weight and Height at 5.5 Months
Noah is 5 months, 2 weeks, and 1 day old
Since we measured Noah yesterday and found out he was 29 inches tall (to put this in perspective for you, 29 inches is the height of the average 11 month old), I really wanted to find out how much he weighed. 2 1/2 weeks ago he was just under 17 lbs. Since he seems to be gaining about a pound a month now, I figured he'd probably gained about half a pound. But he had gained that inch, and he didn't feel any heavier, so I wasn't quite sure.
When he got weighed with his clothes and diaper on he was 17 lbs 11 oz. When we got home I put his onesie and diaper (which wasn't very full) on our food scale. Together they weighed 4 oz, putting Noah at 17 lbs 7 oz. This is also keeping in mind that he had recently been fed and hasn't pooped in about 3 days.
So he's gained about half a pound, and is right around 17.5 lbs.
He's back off the charts for weight for height now, just like when he was born. 5th percentile for weight for height for 29 inches starts at 18 lbs, and he's still under 17.5 lbs. The nurse told me not to worry (I wasn't worried, but I asked her if I SHOULD be). He's gaining fine, he's just a tall, lean baby. And even though those "weight for height" charts exist out there, nobody can say what your child SHOULD weigh for their height. It's just like those weight for height charts for adults, which don't take into account how heavy your bones are, how big your boobs are, how much muscle you have, etc. Plus the chart I'm looking at isn't for exclusively breastfed babies, anyway. So just because he's, like, 0th percentile for weight for height doesn't mean he's unhealthy.
At least now I don't feel like someone is going to start making an issue out of how skinny he is. When I told my mom he grew an inch in the past 2 weeks but I didn't think he put on much weight, she was like "He should have gained at least a pound if he grew an inch!!" My little sister was put on formula when she was a baby because she was just growing longer and only gaining enough weight to accommodate her increase in height. I guess the doctors almost thought she had failure to thrive. So when my mom makes comments like that I worry that the doctor will start making an issue of his weight for his height (even though his weight is a little over 50th percentile for his age). And I start to think that I should be trying to feed him more often, even though he's already breastfed on demand.
Like I've said before, I just have a stringbean. And I'm okay with it!
Since we measured Noah yesterday and found out he was 29 inches tall (to put this in perspective for you, 29 inches is the height of the average 11 month old), I really wanted to find out how much he weighed. 2 1/2 weeks ago he was just under 17 lbs. Since he seems to be gaining about a pound a month now, I figured he'd probably gained about half a pound. But he had gained that inch, and he didn't feel any heavier, so I wasn't quite sure.
When he got weighed with his clothes and diaper on he was 17 lbs 11 oz. When we got home I put his onesie and diaper (which wasn't very full) on our food scale. Together they weighed 4 oz, putting Noah at 17 lbs 7 oz. This is also keeping in mind that he had recently been fed and hasn't pooped in about 3 days.
So he's gained about half a pound, and is right around 17.5 lbs.
He's back off the charts for weight for height now, just like when he was born. 5th percentile for weight for height for 29 inches starts at 18 lbs, and he's still under 17.5 lbs. The nurse told me not to worry (I wasn't worried, but I asked her if I SHOULD be). He's gaining fine, he's just a tall, lean baby. And even though those "weight for height" charts exist out there, nobody can say what your child SHOULD weigh for their height. It's just like those weight for height charts for adults, which don't take into account how heavy your bones are, how big your boobs are, how much muscle you have, etc. Plus the chart I'm looking at isn't for exclusively breastfed babies, anyway. So just because he's, like, 0th percentile for weight for height doesn't mean he's unhealthy.
At least now I don't feel like someone is going to start making an issue out of how skinny he is. When I told my mom he grew an inch in the past 2 weeks but I didn't think he put on much weight, she was like "He should have gained at least a pound if he grew an inch!!" My little sister was put on formula when she was a baby because she was just growing longer and only gaining enough weight to accommodate her increase in height. I guess the doctors almost thought she had failure to thrive. So when my mom makes comments like that I worry that the doctor will start making an issue of his weight for his height (even though his weight is a little over 50th percentile for his age). And I start to think that I should be trying to feed him more often, even though he's already breastfed on demand.
Like I've said before, I just have a stringbean. And I'm okay with it!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Little Genius
Noah is 5 months and 2 weeks old
Today Justin and I were amazed as we watched Noah. He started out lying on his back on his activity mat. He looked to his right and saw his blue bucket of toys. He rolled over onto his tummy, quickly rotated 90 degrees, scooted forward, reached out his hand, grabbed the bucket, pulled it toward himself, intentionally tipped it over, and reached inside to grab at his toys.
This all happened in the span of one minute.
My child is a genius.
Today Justin and I were amazed as we watched Noah. He started out lying on his back on his activity mat. He looked to his right and saw his blue bucket of toys. He rolled over onto his tummy, quickly rotated 90 degrees, scooted forward, reached out his hand, grabbed the bucket, pulled it toward himself, intentionally tipped it over, and reached inside to grab at his toys.
This all happened in the span of one minute.
My child is a genius.
Operation No-Swaddle, Day 5
Today was Day 5 of Operation No-Swaddle. I think it went pretty well. He had 3 naps in total, and each nap entailed quite a bit of fussing and back arching when I was trying to put him down. So for each nap I had to lie him in his crib once or twice and leave him there for a few minutes before going back in to attempt to put him to sleep again. As opposed to some of the other fussy naps, this didn't seem to be at all related to his arm being out of the swaddle. I think he just didn't want to sleep.
So, considering the fussiness, you might be wondering why I said today went pretty well. But Noah's first nap was an hour and 20 minutes long! He finally had that long nap I've been waiting for... does this mean I need to move on with my plans and unswaddle both arms tomorrow? Eek!!
His other two naps were the normal 40 minutes long. I haven't decided if tomorrow I should unswaddle both arms and just wrap him up around his chest. Justin is gone all day tomorrow at work. So I guess I'll just see how I feel, how much patience I have, etc.
So, considering the fussiness, you might be wondering why I said today went pretty well. But Noah's first nap was an hour and 20 minutes long! He finally had that long nap I've been waiting for... does this mean I need to move on with my plans and unswaddle both arms tomorrow? Eek!!
His other two naps were the normal 40 minutes long. I haven't decided if tomorrow I should unswaddle both arms and just wrap him up around his chest. Justin is gone all day tomorrow at work. So I guess I'll just see how I feel, how much patience I have, etc.
My Giant
Noah is 5 months and 2 weeks old
My child is a giant.
Justin and I have been thinking that Noah looked taller. He was just measured 2 weeks ago, so in my head I was thinking He can't be that much taller. But he really did look it. For the past few days everytime I've lifted him into and out of the tub I'm commented on how big he is.
Justin said we should measure him. I was expecting it to all be in our imaginations, or maybe he would be half an inch taller. I mean, it had only been 2 WEEKS since he was last measured, and he was 28 inches then. He's approaching 6 months, and height gains are supposed to slow down at 6 months.
Anyway, we got out a book to hold against the top his head so the measurement would be exact. Justin held the book, and I measured from the bottom of his heel up to the book.
No, that can't be right.
I measure again.
And again.
Yep, that's right. My child grew an inch in the past 2 weeks. He is now 29 inches long. He is so far off the percentile charts it's ridiculous. The charts only go to 100th percentile, and he's waaaaaaay above that. Like, 150th percentile.
I don't mind that he's tall, but he's outgrowing his toys!! He's too tall for his Evenflo exersaucer, and only like 2 links away from being too tall for his jolly jumper (it's one of those hanging jumpers, for those who don't know)!
I'm researching tall baby toys. Apparently the Fisher Price jumperoos are good for tall babies, but that's another $150!! And if he keeps growing this fast, the jumperoo won't work for very long either. But the poor baby needs something to play in! It was only a few weeks ago that he got really good at playing in his exersaucer, spinning around and grabbing his toys and making things light up and sing. And now he's too tall for it on the tallest setting!!
I'm pretty sure he would love the jumperoo, because he's always trying to jump in his exersaucer (it bounces a little). But I have a hard time spending that much money on something that he might only use for a couple of months and then grow out of. I know they've been on sale, but they aren't right now. And if we wait until they go back ON sale, he'll have even less time in it!
You know we're going to have one of those kids who has to shop at stores that are 2 hours away because he's so tall. And at this point he's so darn skinny that pants that fit him are too big around the waist. No wonder, since children his height are usually way older, and therefore weigh a lot more.
If we have to special order his shoes from Germany I'm going to be upset.
;)
My child is a giant.
Justin and I have been thinking that Noah looked taller. He was just measured 2 weeks ago, so in my head I was thinking He can't be that much taller. But he really did look it. For the past few days everytime I've lifted him into and out of the tub I'm commented on how big he is.
Justin said we should measure him. I was expecting it to all be in our imaginations, or maybe he would be half an inch taller. I mean, it had only been 2 WEEKS since he was last measured, and he was 28 inches then. He's approaching 6 months, and height gains are supposed to slow down at 6 months.
Anyway, we got out a book to hold against the top his head so the measurement would be exact. Justin held the book, and I measured from the bottom of his heel up to the book.
No, that can't be right.
I measure again.
And again.
Yep, that's right. My child grew an inch in the past 2 weeks. He is now 29 inches long. He is so far off the percentile charts it's ridiculous. The charts only go to 100th percentile, and he's waaaaaaay above that. Like, 150th percentile.
I don't mind that he's tall, but he's outgrowing his toys!! He's too tall for his Evenflo exersaucer, and only like 2 links away from being too tall for his jolly jumper (it's one of those hanging jumpers, for those who don't know)!
I'm researching tall baby toys. Apparently the Fisher Price jumperoos are good for tall babies, but that's another $150!! And if he keeps growing this fast, the jumperoo won't work for very long either. But the poor baby needs something to play in! It was only a few weeks ago that he got really good at playing in his exersaucer, spinning around and grabbing his toys and making things light up and sing. And now he's too tall for it on the tallest setting!!
I'm pretty sure he would love the jumperoo, because he's always trying to jump in his exersaucer (it bounces a little). But I have a hard time spending that much money on something that he might only use for a couple of months and then grow out of. I know they've been on sale, but they aren't right now. And if we wait until they go back ON sale, he'll have even less time in it!
You know we're going to have one of those kids who has to shop at stores that are 2 hours away because he's so tall. And at this point he's so darn skinny that pants that fit him are too big around the waist. No wonder, since children his height are usually way older, and therefore weigh a lot more.
If we have to special order his shoes from Germany I'm going to be upset.
;)
Baby Sitter
Noah is 5 months and 2 weeks old
Noah is becoming such a good little sitter! 2 weeks ago he could only sit unassisted for a couple of seconds at a time, and only if he was in the mood. Now he can go as long as 15 seconds totally on his own. He is getting better at self correcting when he starts to move forward, backward, or to the side, and he bends in half way less often than he used to. And all of this is consistent behaviour, rather than once in awhile.
Alot of these strides have been made in just the past week. Even since Sunday (it is now Wednesday) I notice a big difference. He is much straighter now.
It's funny how things happen so suddenly. One week ago today I was saying to my friend that there was no way Noah was going to be sitting at well as Aubrey is at exactly 6 months (he had 3 weeks to get there - Aubrey is 3 weeks older than him). She sits straight up without bracing herself at all! But things have changed SO much in the one week since then, I'm now totally confident that he'll be sitting really well by the time he's 6 months.
I just love watching Noah grow up. Everything happens so fast!
Noah is becoming such a good little sitter! 2 weeks ago he could only sit unassisted for a couple of seconds at a time, and only if he was in the mood. Now he can go as long as 15 seconds totally on his own. He is getting better at self correcting when he starts to move forward, backward, or to the side, and he bends in half way less often than he used to. And all of this is consistent behaviour, rather than once in awhile.
Alot of these strides have been made in just the past week. Even since Sunday (it is now Wednesday) I notice a big difference. He is much straighter now.
It's funny how things happen so suddenly. One week ago today I was saying to my friend that there was no way Noah was going to be sitting at well as Aubrey is at exactly 6 months (he had 3 weeks to get there - Aubrey is 3 weeks older than him). She sits straight up without bracing herself at all! But things have changed SO much in the one week since then, I'm now totally confident that he'll be sitting really well by the time he's 6 months.
I just love watching Noah grow up. Everything happens so fast!
It's the Week Before School, and All Through the House...
Well, I can't say we're not stirring. But this year, the only person whose routine is changing is my dear husband, Justin.
For anyone who started reading my blog more recently, I am/was an elementary school teacher (and my husband is a high school teacher and coach). I went off work in January when I was 30 weeks pregnant because I tore the cartilage in my pubic bone and could barely walk. Luckily I did this while I was AT work, teaching kindergarten gym, reaching for a little brat who was running around hitting his classmates. So I was off on WSIB until my maternity leave started when Noah was born.
Furthermore, I live in the wonderful country of Canada, where the government pays your maternity leave at 60% of your salary for a full year. Yes, it's fantastic. And if I hadn't been on WSIB for the 8 weeks before I gave birth, the government would have paid me 60% of my salary for those 8 weeks because I would have been on disability.
I can't decide whether it seems strange to me that I'm not preparing for another school year. In some ways it's weird, and in other ways it feels completely normal. All I know is that I am so thankful I'm not leaving my 5 1/2 month old while I go back to work.
I would be so depressed and stressed out having to leave Noah and start teaching again. The beginning of the school year is stressful enough without adding in leaving your baby. I would be having anxiety attacks. I would want to quit life.
I feel so blessed and grateful that I can stay home with my baby for a year - and get paid! And I am even more thankful that I can stay home with him even after that. If I didn't know I can be a stay at home mom, every week that passes in Noah's life would just make me more sad, because I'd know that soon enough I'd have to leave him. I can barely leave my baby with my own mother for an hour. And a one year old is still very much a baby in my eyes. I always said, long before I was even married, that I didn't know how I would leave my one year old with someone else and go back to work. It's wonderful to know that I don't have to.
It's not as if we're rolling in the dough over here. If we depend on Justin's salary alone we come up a few hundred dollars short every month. Gas and groceries are just so darn expensive, and there's always SOMETHING that comes up, like wedding presents, birthday presents, car servicing, etc. So his salary alone doesn't quite get us there. But it gets us very close. And he spends his "summers off" training clients to make extra money that we stash away. We're also saving every dollar of my mat leave pay that we can. Between our regular savings and the cash he makes training (about ten thousand a summer), we can make it. We have decided that we will sacrifice, pinch pennies, and pull from our savings when we need to, maybe even making our way into our line of credit (although this is unlikely to happen), so that I can stay home with our kids.
I am thrilled with this arrangement, and so is Justin (his mom went back to work when he was 6 weeks old, even though she didn't need to). But I can't decide whether I think it's weird that I won't be working again until all of our kids are in school full time. I think I'm just happy about it.
The ironic thing is that by the time our kids are all in school full time I definitely don't need to work. In about 3 years Justin will be making as much money as we were making combined before I stopped working. I'll probably go back and work part time, though. But I don't want to work fulltime until my kids are way older. Maybe not until they're out of the house. Or ever. :)
While I can't decide whether the knowledge that I won't be teaching for the next decade or so is weird, I do know that I don't miss it. I think that's a little bit strange. I don't really miss teaching. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, but I just don't miss it. I don't miss my school, I don't miss my staff, I definitely don't miss my boss. I miss the kids a little bit, but I see a lot of them at church. I think I just love being a SAHM so much that it overshadows any "missing" that might occur. Then again, when I was off on WSIB I didn't miss teaching then either. My boss had made my job so miserable I was just so happy to be out of there, even if I was in excruciating pain.
I kind of went off on a tangent here. But my main point is that I am just SO grateful that I can have the privilege of staying home with Noah (and any future children we might have). To leave him would absolutely break my heart, and to be with him all day brings me more joy than I've ever known! (Even though sometimes he drives me nuts at naptime;)
For anyone who started reading my blog more recently, I am/was an elementary school teacher (and my husband is a high school teacher and coach). I went off work in January when I was 30 weeks pregnant because I tore the cartilage in my pubic bone and could barely walk. Luckily I did this while I was AT work, teaching kindergarten gym, reaching for a little brat who was running around hitting his classmates. So I was off on WSIB until my maternity leave started when Noah was born.
Furthermore, I live in the wonderful country of Canada, where the government pays your maternity leave at 60% of your salary for a full year. Yes, it's fantastic. And if I hadn't been on WSIB for the 8 weeks before I gave birth, the government would have paid me 60% of my salary for those 8 weeks because I would have been on disability.
I can't decide whether it seems strange to me that I'm not preparing for another school year. In some ways it's weird, and in other ways it feels completely normal. All I know is that I am so thankful I'm not leaving my 5 1/2 month old while I go back to work.
I would be so depressed and stressed out having to leave Noah and start teaching again. The beginning of the school year is stressful enough without adding in leaving your baby. I would be having anxiety attacks. I would want to quit life.
I feel so blessed and grateful that I can stay home with my baby for a year - and get paid! And I am even more thankful that I can stay home with him even after that. If I didn't know I can be a stay at home mom, every week that passes in Noah's life would just make me more sad, because I'd know that soon enough I'd have to leave him. I can barely leave my baby with my own mother for an hour. And a one year old is still very much a baby in my eyes. I always said, long before I was even married, that I didn't know how I would leave my one year old with someone else and go back to work. It's wonderful to know that I don't have to.
It's not as if we're rolling in the dough over here. If we depend on Justin's salary alone we come up a few hundred dollars short every month. Gas and groceries are just so darn expensive, and there's always SOMETHING that comes up, like wedding presents, birthday presents, car servicing, etc. So his salary alone doesn't quite get us there. But it gets us very close. And he spends his "summers off" training clients to make extra money that we stash away. We're also saving every dollar of my mat leave pay that we can. Between our regular savings and the cash he makes training (about ten thousand a summer), we can make it. We have decided that we will sacrifice, pinch pennies, and pull from our savings when we need to, maybe even making our way into our line of credit (although this is unlikely to happen), so that I can stay home with our kids.
I am thrilled with this arrangement, and so is Justin (his mom went back to work when he was 6 weeks old, even though she didn't need to). But I can't decide whether I think it's weird that I won't be working again until all of our kids are in school full time. I think I'm just happy about it.
The ironic thing is that by the time our kids are all in school full time I definitely don't need to work. In about 3 years Justin will be making as much money as we were making combined before I stopped working. I'll probably go back and work part time, though. But I don't want to work fulltime until my kids are way older. Maybe not until they're out of the house. Or ever. :)
While I can't decide whether the knowledge that I won't be teaching for the next decade or so is weird, I do know that I don't miss it. I think that's a little bit strange. I don't really miss teaching. It's not that I didn't enjoy it, but I just don't miss it. I don't miss my school, I don't miss my staff, I definitely don't miss my boss. I miss the kids a little bit, but I see a lot of them at church. I think I just love being a SAHM so much that it overshadows any "missing" that might occur. Then again, when I was off on WSIB I didn't miss teaching then either. My boss had made my job so miserable I was just so happy to be out of there, even if I was in excruciating pain.
I kind of went off on a tangent here. But my main point is that I am just SO grateful that I can have the privilege of staying home with Noah (and any future children we might have). To leave him would absolutely break my heart, and to be with him all day brings me more joy than I've ever known! (Even though sometimes he drives me nuts at naptime;)
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